


Forever a Flame, a Burning Desire

by Burgundy_Embers



Category: Hunger Games Series - All Media Types, Hunger Games Trilogy - Suzanne Collins, The Hunger Games (Movies)
Genre: A love Story, Eventual Sex, Eventual Smut, F/M, Falling In Love, Intimacy, Kissing, Romance, Time between Hunger Games and Catching Fire
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-06
Updated: 2016-08-28
Packaged: 2018-07-29 17:58:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 31,291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7693981
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Burgundy_Embers/pseuds/Burgundy_Embers
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Takes place right after Peeta and Katniss win the 74th Hunger Games. It's a more in-depth retelling (both books and movies combined) of Peeta and Katniss falling in love before the Victory Tour and of how things have changed. Includes unexpected twists, additions, and lots romance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Hunger Games (1)

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I do not own anything at all. All the characters belong to the wonderful Suzanne Collins.
> 
> This story will follow the movies mostly and parts of the books, but not so closely as I continue to write. Things will be different, so please bear with me. It picks up soon, I promise.

"Let me in!" I yell and gasp for air at the same time, banging the side of my fist against the clear crystal glass, trying to get the doctor's attention. "Let me in!" I repeat this over and over, and I know I've failed when I'm ignored.

Hot tears stream down my face as I feel myself slide down to the cool hard ground. The doctors huddle around Peeta, working frantically on bringing him back to good health. There are so many wires from machines hooked up to his lifeless body. All I can do is stare and hope he'll be okay.

_What if he doesn't make it?_ I know I will not be able to live with myself if he doesn't. I should have killed him when I had the chance tobefore I pulled out the nightlock berries. He begged me to take his life. He told me there wouldn't be anything left for him if he returned instead of me. I was his true love since we were children. He had told me in the cave, and again, confessed his love for me by the Cornucopia.

I was unsure of what to say at those moments, knowing I didn't respond the way I should have, but now . . . now I am wishing that I had responded in a way that made him believe I was in love with him just as he was with me instead of telling myself to act for the games to survive.

Now I won't ever get the chance to tell him if he ends up dead by the Capitol doctors. President Snow might have ordered them to finish Peeta off if they were so desperate to have one victor from the beginning. It would be simpler that way, wouldn't it? To get rid of the one that's already lost too much blood than the one who had only a few deep scratches. Why waste their time?

Before I know it, the doctors and Peeta are gone. A light brighter than the sun appears, and I begin to panic. I hear heels clicking on the floor hurriedly as I try to make myself stand. My legs are too shaky, making it difficult.

The clicking heels grow louder and louder and suddenly, two guards appear behind me, lifting me up, both having a grip on my upper arms. I feel rage rise in my body. I start to fight back, but the woman jabs me with a needle, and I feel something cool enter my veins, then everything goes black.

— • — • — • — •— • — • — 

I'm barely conscious and I feel like I'm floating. I notice a man in a white uniform is carrying me as we pass silver coated walls. We enter a room, and he places me on a metal table nearby. I feel my left arm extend out, then I feel a few stings in my arm. I look over and see a woman giving a shot of some sort in my IV line.

A woman starts to take my clothes off piece by piece. I try to protest, but what I try to say comes out as a mumble. Whatever they have injected me with is taking its full effect. My body responds to the movements the woman is wanting me to do as she changes me into a royal blue dressing gown. When she finishes, I feel her tilting my shoulders back, then I'm laying back down, looking straight up at the ceiling. My head feels dizzy, and I close my eyes for a short moment. I try to open my eyes again, but the bright light above makes me shut them once again.

I feel the top part of my dressing gown being lifted up and feel cold objects being placed on my bare chest. I open my eyes immediately, and I can hear the doctors whispering. I can't understand what they're saying. I try to ask what's going on but whatever is in my system makes me mumble and makes my tongue feel silly. I try to listen closely, but it's impossible. I look around the room and see other doctors bringing over medical supplies. It worries me.

I lift my head to get a better look, and my head feels heavier, causing me to lay it back down. Sleep is wanting to come every second and my body wants to give in. I mustn't fall asleep. I need to know what they are going to do to me. What if they try to kill me instead? Or kill us both? Who knows what they did with Peeta.

A mask like object moves over my face. All I can see is a hand of someone bringing it lower to my face, covering my mouth and nose. I can still breathe easily.

I feel another couple of stings run up my arm, then my eyes close as I'm pulled into darkness.


	2. Hunger Games (2)

I wake up and the room is freezing. Only a white blanket and a white bed sheet covers me. I try to sit up, but restraining bands are around my waist, legs, and wrists, causing me to panic. "Hello?! Is anyone there?" I yell out. "Someone please release me!" Tears start to form in my eyes as I try to wiggle free.

It's only me in the room with my echoes. I'm not sure what day it is or what time it is. There's no windows or a clock in the room. A woman enters.

"What's going on?" I ask as I raise my head. She doesn't answer. She looks at the machines and walks over to me. "Hey! I'm talking to you!" She remains silent. I feel a hot, burning sensation run through my arm. "What's going —" I start, then everything goes black.

— • — • — • — • — • — • — 

I dream a lot. I don't know why.

I dream of my father taking me out into the woods, teaching me how to hunt for the first time with my first and only bow.

I dream of my father teaching Prim and I the _Hanging Tree_ song in the meadow. When we finish for the afternoon, my father leads us back home. The green meadow starts to change to gravel and Prim and our father disappear, then the square surrounds me and I see the stage with everyone in the district gathered there.

I hear Effie talking about the Games and see myself volunteering for Prim when her name was called. I watch Prim scream and Gale carry her away to our mother. I told myself not to cry that day, but watching myself now, how could I not. No one is watching me.

As I start to let the tears fall, I hear a girl scream. "Katniss, help me!"

It's Rue. Without thinking, I start to run into a woodland area. I've passed the pile Rue was to light on fire but never got to. I know what's about to happen and I can't stop it. _I can't stop anything._

Rue's stabbed, and I shoot my arrow at the enemy. Rue is dying in my arms and I sing to her. She reminded me so much like Prim. Too young and innocent to take part in the Games.

I am then transferred to the Cornucopia where Peeta is in Cato's hold. He's about to kill him and I shoot my arrow too late, still hitting his hand where Peeta marked, but this time it's both Cato and Peeta who fall down to the ground. The mutts are killing them. I scream Peeta's name, and start to cry. There's nothing I can do as I watch the mutts tear him to pieces.

I kill the mutts one by one, wasting all my arrows. A cannon goes off and I know that Cato is dead, but Peeta is barely breathing with a little chance to live. I realize we still have a chance at winning. Both of us are from the same District and we survived, but then Claudius Templesmith's voice speaks.

"Attention, tributes. Attention. There has been a mistake. Only one tribute will be declared the Victor. May the odds be ever in your favor."

It's silent for a few moments, then I hear a cannon go off and see Peeta lying dead in my arms.

I start to scream while staring at Peeta's dead body, hearing Claudius Templesmith congratulate me for being the winner of the 74th Hunger Games.

I start the cry. This wasn't supposed to happen. It's not how it went. I look at Peeta's lifeless body, and I cry harder than I ever have before.

— • — • — • — • — • — • — 

I awake, jumping and breathing heavily. My cheeks are wet from my dreams. I automatically try to wipe them and it's then that I realize I can move.

I'm no longer restrained. I sit up immediately, causing my head to ache and dizziness to come while I look around the room. It's different. The lights aren't as bright as they were before. The walls are a different color and there's a window and a clock on the wall.

Outside of the room I can hear hushed voices and people cheering loudly outside. I'm back at the Capitol. Maybe I'll be able to see Haymitch and Effie again. Maybe even my team, who I surprisingly miss. And then Peeta. _How will I face him?_ My heart stops. I'm barely able to breathe. _Is he okay? Did he make it? Would he be in the next room?_ I have to know how he is. Images flood my head at how I last saw him, lying limp on the medical bed. Weak and unmoving.

_Peeta._

I quickly get of bed and get dressed in the pile of clothes laying at the foot of the bed. I immediately recognize them. It's the black shirt, green pants, and black boots that I wore in the arena, only this time there are no holes and cuts and blood stains. They're brand new.

I tie the freshly polished boots and place my hand on the doorknob. This was it. To face whatever happens next. To forget about home. Home wouldn't be home if Peeta wasn't alive. I open the door.

"Peeta!" I call out.

"Katniss!" I hear a woman's voice answer back. It isn't him. Where is he? "Katniss," the woman calls out again. It's Effie.

I start running down the hallway leading into the main room. All I see is Effie, Haymitch, and Cinna. Peeta is nowhere to be found. Not even Portia. I suddenly find myself in Haymitch's arms.

"Nice job, sweetheart," he says with a smile. He smells of whisky, which normally I would find gross but now it is comforting. It's him.

"Where's Peeta?" I ask. Tears are about to fall down my face as I'm trying to stay strong and brace myself for the news.

"Calm down, sweetheart. He's doing just fine. He's alive."

_He's alive. Oh thank God._

"He barely came through, but the kid made it."

I pull away from Haymitch and wipe the tears from my face. "Where is he? Can I see him?" I ask, trying to get my sniffling under control.

"He's with Portia, getting ready for tonight's interview. That's when you'll see him. They want to capture your reunion live tonight in all hopes of you waking up today and thank goodness you did!" Effie exclaims. "That would have been a disaster if you didn't! It's been four days!"

Her outfit is still ridiculous as usual. Still, I'm happy to be around her again even though I really didn't appreciate her presence from the beginning. But now everyone is close. It's as if we are our own little family. I give Effie a quick hug, which makes her start to cry.

"I've missed you," I whisper, letting her know because it is true. I've missed all of them. Even though it's been a short while, they all have grown on me.

"Oh Katniss! You're going to make me mess up my makeup if you keep that up!"

Then it's Cinna, amazingly dressed, who pulls me in for a quick hug. "I've missed you, Girl on Fire."

I smile. "I've missed you too," I return.

Cinna smiles. "Now go and eat your dinner. There's no rush, but we do need to start getting you ready for tonight."

"Okay," I tell him as he points me in the right direction to the dinning room.

When I make my to the dinning room and sit at the table, I can still see Haymitch, Effie, and Cinna sitting on the sofa not too far away, talking. I can barely hear what they are saying, but a few glances from them at my direction tells me that they are talking about me.

I start to get angry, but I brush it off quickly and try to focus on the meal in front of me. There isn't much on the table. Only a dinner plate that has roast beef, peas, and two rolls on it accompanied by a pitcher of sparkling water and a glass.

I pour myself some water and take a few sips, and quickly my glass is empty. I pour my glass full again and finish it off. My thirst surprises, but I guess it's mostly due to dehydration from the Games. After drinking plenty of water, I slowly start to eat my food. It all tastes so good. It's hard not to eat it all so quickly when I want to make it last. Glancing around the room, I know I won't get seconds.

When I set my fork down on my empty plate, I see Haymitch enter the dinning room, carrying a slice of chocolate cake with a small strawberry on the side.

"The cook decided to bring you a piece since you were his favorite. Figured as much," he says as he sets the cake down in front of me, then moves to sit across from me.

I pour myself another glass of water and stare at the cake. "Thanks," I say, then I take a bite of the cake. The icing and cake combined is rich of chocolate. Normally I wouldn't eat it, but my hunger wins over.

I watch Haymitch and the expression on his face seems to be trying to figure out what to say or how to say it. It's something serious I can tell. Something's up. "Spit it out. What is it?" I demand.

"You're in trouble," Haymitch says a few seconds later.

_Oh no. What now? What could be so bad now that I've survived the Hunger Games?_

"The Capitol's furious about you and Peeta showing them up in the arena. The one thing they can't stand is being laughed at and they're the joke of Panem."

I stop eating the delicious cake at the sudden loss of appetite. "So?"

"So your only defense can be you were madly in love and you weren't responsible for your actions. Got it, sweetheart?" Haymitch tells me seriously, leaning forward.

"Got it." I take a sip of water, trying to rid the dryness in my throat at the news. "Does Peeta know about this?"

"He's already there," he says.

"And you think I'm not?"

"Since when does it matter what I think?"

I sigh, pushing my dessert plate forward.

Haymitch gets up and walks away. "She's ready for you," he hollers out to Cinna, I assume.

_What am I going to do now? I've only now just started to feel things for Peeta, but was it only an impulse thing? Sure on the hovercraft that was taking us back to the Capitol, I worried about him and wanted to tell him I felt the same way, but did I mean it? He was dying right there before me. Were my true feelings coming out then?_ I didn't want anything to do with love, and look at where it has me now. I'm afraid this is something I won't ever be able to escape.

Trying to clear my head, Cinna makes his way toward me. "Ready?" he asks with a smile.

"Ready as I'll ever be," I say with a frown. I'm not ready for this. Of course I'll see Peeta. I'm happy for that, to actually know for myself that he is okay and well. It's the ceremony I'm not ready for. I don't want to see the recap of what I just experienced and went through to stay alive.

We head out of the hospital-like building area, and Cinna protects me from all the cameras and reporters that want information as a new Victor of the Games. We make it past them easily and go down a few more halls.

As we walk, I notice to the left of me is the Training Center and it's barely lit. A few peacekeepers are guarding the area. Their reflections are on the huge glass windows. I get shivers and a few images flash through my mind of when all twenty-four of us were once at our training stations that were to help us last longer than we would without them. This passage was full of people passing by and watching us all train. Now it's empty except for the two of us. The only noise is our own footsteps and the buzzing lights up above.

We then enter into an elevator that takes us to the twelfth floor where we stayed once before. Passing sections one through eleven reminds me of the dead tributes that will never return. It sickens me that it has to be like this every year.

The elevator comes to a stop and the doors open. Flavius, Octavia, and Venia all rush over to me and hug me all at once. I'm suffocating by their tight hold, but it comforts me even though I'm not as happy to see them as they are to see me. We move toward my room where I slept in, waiting for the day of the Games.

As my prep team gets the shower ready for me, they tell me I need to shave since there isn't any time for them to wax me. That's fine by me because I don't think I can handle any pain right now.

When I hop into the shower, I wash my body and shave quickly get out. I turn off the steamy water and grab a towel and begin to dry my body. I notice that the scars on my body are no longer there from the Games. I'm not sure how I feel about it, but I know that I don't want to be reminded anymore than I have to. As for the Capitol, they simply don't want to see their new Victor scared for life from the bloodbath war.

Once I leave the bathroom and enter the bedroom, my team sits me down in a chair, then they begin to dry and comb my hair.

They start on my nails, then style my hair and put makeup on me. All they talk about was what they did when the games were going on. They didn't care for the dying and dead, just the bloody events that took place and what they were doing at that time.

It sickens me how the true way the Capitol is. I had an idea they didn't care, but witnessing it was worse. Only caring for their entertainment and not the dead or the ones that once lived and how special they were to the people in their lives.

When they finish all but Octavia stays while they fetch Cinna. He enters, carrying a beautiful yellow colored dress.

"Still up for the Girl on Fire thing?" I ask.

"Always," he says as he slips the gown over my head and down my body. Cinna turns me so that he can zip the dress, and I look into the mirror.

This dress gives me a more curvy figure than I've had before. Probably to hide away the hunger from my body. It goes just above my knees and I feel somewhat uncomfortable. I never wore anything so exposing before. Sure, strapless was nothing, but strapless and short? I've never worn anything like that. I notice my legs seem longer without heels as Flavius enters with shows and slips the sandals on my feet. My hair is down and in waves. I look more like a girl, so young. It's me but it isn't me at the same time as I seem to glow like a candlelight.

"One of the best yet." I smile as I look in the mirror again, and I see Cinna smiling through the mirror at another one of his beautiful pieces.

Once the others dress, we make our way down the elevator again and walk to where all the tributes had their interview on the eve of the Games. When we reach backstage, I find myself suddenly all alone under a small dim light.

I feel someone touch my shoulder, causing me to turn around.

"Easy. Just me," Haymitch assures me. "Let me look at you." I do a little twirl. "Good enough."

_Not much of a compliment at all._ I frown. "But what?"

"But nothing. Just remember what I told you earlier." He pulls me into a quick hug. "This is your night. Enjoy it, sweetheart."

With that, I start to shake. My night. It isn't my night. The only one who really deserves this is Peeta. I have to convince all of Panem that I am in love with him even if I am or not. I've never been in such a dangerous place before in my life. Yes, being hunted in the arena is bad; I could only die there. Here, I've got my family and people I love at home that could be severely punished if I don't act like the star-crossed lovers from District Twelve. And Peeta. I could hurt him worse and cause his family and the people he loves pain as well. I couldn't do that to him either. I know he is already desperately in love with me. He doesn't need to act. He knows what to do. It will be easy for him. It's my problem. I just can't wait to go home and sort out my feelings.

Who knows when that will be, but now the most dangerous part of the Hunger Games is about to begin.


	3. Hunger Games (3)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I again want you all to know that this story will pick up soon. Things are starting to get different and I won't be following the books as much. This is all just build up.

The capital anthem roars through the speakers and the audience cheers as Caesar Flickerman makes his way center stage. "Good evening, ladies and gentlemen!" he greets them.

The audience cheers loudly, and he gives a welcoming laugh. He quiets down the crowd as he begins to speak.

"Ladies and Gentlemen, just four days ago we witnessed Panem's star-crossed lovers from Distract Twelve win the 74th Hunger Games. In just a few minutes we will hear about what it was like for them inside the arena. But first, let's introduce all who made it happen!" He laughs loudly and the audience cheers loudly again.

_I'm so not ready for this._

As I'm watching from the big flat screen on wall, I see Flavius, Venia, and Octavia walk across the stage one by one, receiving a few roars from the audience as Caesar introduces them. They bow and shake Caesar's hand like it's a once and a lifetime thing. Sure it is, but couldn't they act a bit normal?

Caesar motions for them to sit to the left of his seat, but not directly. He calls Cinna and Portia next and they make their way on stage. They both wave and smile as the audience goes crazy. I imagine they are the number one designers now ever since mine and Peeta's appearance on the chariots. They take their seats closer to Caesar's chair.

"Effie Trinket, District Twelve's escort!"

As Caesar calls her name, Effie makes her way on stage. She looks so happy and surprisingly not acting as ridiculous as my prep team did. She looks like she is enjoying herself and I hope she is.

"Haymitch Abernathy, District Twelve's mentor!"

The crowd roars louder as Haymitch walks on the stage with a little stagger. He isn't drunk, which is surprising. He's clean and dressed up nice. He smiles to the audience and gives a small wave to them, then Caesar shakes his hand. This just might be an actual happy moment for Haymitch. He was the only District Twelve Victor until now, and he's made history by keeping two tributes alive.

Effie and Haymitch take their seat right next Caesar's chair on the left.

I notice there's a bright red love seat to the right which is this year's new Victor chair since two lovers won the Games. I now know that this where Peeta and I are to sit and we are next.

A woman dressed in many bright colors holding a clipboard and wearing an ear piece walks over to me. "You have fifteen seconds until you're on stage. Be ready," she says before walking away.

I swallow hard. I don't know why I'm getting so nervous now. I don't know what the cause is. Certainly it isn't Peeta. I mean, this is the first time I will see him since the arena. Is it because I have to act like I'm in love with Peeta? Or is it that I'm about to face all of Panem and convince them of my love, and I might fail? I don't know. _I mustn't._

"Now, what everyone's been waiting for . . ." Caesar pauses and the crowd goes silent, but a few hollers and whistles are heard. "District 12 Victors of the 74th Hunger Games, Peeta Mellark and Katniss Everdeen!"

I begin to walk across the stage and there is Peeta, looking handsome as ever and healthy. He's smiling his bright smile that makes me smile no matter what conditions we are under as he walks toward me. Before I know it, we meet center stage and I fling myself into his arms. I catch him off guard, which makes him readjust his balance. It's odd.

We pull each other into a tight hug and his right hand moves to my cheek. His fingers are in my hair and his thumb rubs my cheek as his left arm wraps around my waist. That's when I feel a slim, metal cane pressing against my back by his strong grip. _Something is very wrong. What happened to him?_

The crowd goes wild and I look into his sparkling blue eyes, questioning him, but then he kisses me. It's a wet and warm kiss. It almost feels like the one in the cave, and I'm suddenly wanting more when I feel him about to part. I wrap my arms tighter around his neck and run my fingers through his golden hair, keeping him there. He presses me tighter against him and it almost hurts, especially the cane pressing into my spine, but I don't care. It feels so good being in his arms and being kissed by him.

I can barely hear the audience going crazy or hear Haymitch telling us that that's enough. Peeta breaks the kiss to catch a quick breath, then he leads is in another kiss. It's deeper this time. I can feel his tongue brush against my lips and I allow him in.

This is really new to me. I've never felt a kiss as powerful as this. My whole body is tingling and warm. I find myself almost moaning and I even hear a low noise or two from Peeta as well. I assume the audience can tell what's going on because they are louder than before.

I feel Haymitch tugging on my arm and I slowly back away. I'm left feeling breathless and dizzy and feel as if the room is spinning.

"Now, isn't that a kiss of true love right there?" Caesar asks the audience, earning cheers and whistles in response while Peeta leads us to our seat. I wonder if Peeta is feeling the same way I'm feeling now.

"I'm sorry about that, Caesar," Peeta says while we both sit down.

I glance at Haymitch, who give me a look that tells me I'm not doing a good enough job at playing the part we talked about just ten minutes ago. I decide to slip my shoes off and tilt my body toward Peeta, bringing my legs up to rest them on the seat, and rest my head on Peeta's shoulder.

He puts his arm around me and I feel all warm inside like I did during those nights I curled up against him in the cave. I notice his shirt is the same color as my dress and the silk is soft against my cheek. The smell of his cologne is intoxicating and fills my stomach with a warm tingling feeling. Why am I feeling this way? I never had these feelings before with anyone. The only guy I've ever hung around was Gale and I never felt this way around him.

"That's quite alright," Caesar smiles. He makes a few more jokes, then the worst part begins.

I tense up and Peeta notices. He rests his cane against his right leg and places his right hand in my lap. Without thinking, I place my left in his. The lights dim and the Capitol symbol appears on the big screens all around the place and scenes, starting with the reaping, then the ones in the arena start to play.

I can't bear to watch. I want to get up from my seat and run, but I know I can't. Peeta is the only one keeping me here. I can't stand to see myself volunteer for Prim and see Peeta reaped. I can't stand seeing Peeta and I riding in the chariot behind the other tributes. I can't stand seeing Peeta mislead the Careers in a different direction, risking his life to save mine. I can't stand seeing the fire balls that burnt my leg, or the tracker jackers that Rue showed me to use to kill the Careers and possibly Peeta at that time.

I can't stand seeing the boy from District One stab Rue and me shooting an arrow, killing him. I can't stand seeing myself singing her the meadow song my father taught me or myself to covering her with flowers after she died in my arms. I can't stand seeing Cato cutting Peeta's leg that caused blood poisoning. I can't stand to see myself rescue Peeta from the river and nursing him back to health the best I can. I can't stand seeing us kiss there in the cave even though a rush of warmth runs through my fingers to my toes, remembering what it felt like. I can't stand seeing myself giving Peeta the shot Haymitch sent me so I could go get the backpack with the supplies we needed to stay alive longer.

I can't stand seeing myself nearly be killed my Clove. I can't stand seeing the mutts running after us and Cato almost killing Peeta again. I can't stand seeing the mutts tear Cato apart or me shooting my arrow, putting him out if his misery. I can't stand seeing myself pull out the berries that we were about to eat, then hearing Peeta and I are the winners. I can't stand seeing myself pounding on the crystal glass window, yelling Peeta's name as the doctors try to revive him. I can't stand seeing mine and Peeta's picture with the words "Winners of the 74th Hunger Games" on top as the heading.

The crowd is cheering and crying as the lights are back to their original lighting. My body is shaking and my hand is almost numb from squeezing Peeta's hand too tight, but it isn't mine that's also numb. We both look at each other and send a brief apologetic smile. We both understand. It was just as difficult for him as it is for me. He kisses my forehead and the Capitol anthem blares loudly through the speakers again. The crowd rises and so do the eight of us, causing me to slip on my shoes quickly.

The atmosphere around me grows cold, stunning me in place. President Snow appears with a two little girls dressed in white, holding a white cushion with this year's Victor Crowns resting on top, following close behind him. The crowd falls silent and in front of Peeta and I is President Snow, looking displeased.


	4. Hunger Games (4)

There are two crowns for two victors. Peeta is the only one worthy for a crown. Not me. He didn't do anything wrong, and he really deserves this. I'm the one who caused all the trouble we are in now. Not him.

President Snow picks up one Victor Crown. He is glaring at me, eyes deadly and unforgiving, as he places the crown on my head. "Congratulations, Miss Everdeen," he says, smiling darkly.

"Thank you," I say, trying to keep my smile.

President Snow picks up the other crown, then walks over to Peeta and places the crown on his head. They seem to have a little moment that leaves Peeta laughing. I can't focus on what they're talking about because all I'm thinking is that we should have eaten the berries no matter what riot because of it. I'm the one who should be punished and blamed for the defiant act. I was just trying to save us from the misery we . . . _I_ am in.

"Ladies and gentlemen of Panem," President Snow begins, "I officially introduce you the winners of this year's 74th Hunger Games, Peeta Mellark and Katniss Everdeen of District Twelve."

The crowd cheers and Peeta takes my hand and moves us forward as we bow and wave to the crowd. A few photographers take a few photos of us, then President Snow shakes our hand and leaves the stage with the two little girls. Peeta and I take our seats again. Now the short interview is about to begin.

"First, I want to say congratulations to you both. It was an outstanding game that I haven't seen in years," Caesar says.

Peeta and I thank him at the same time and we both try to say something.

"Thank —" Peeta and I try to say at the same time.

"No, you go ahead," Peeta says, smiling at me.

"No, you," I say while I feel my cheeks warm. Why am I blushing?

"Isn't this adorable folks?" Caesar says with a laugh, causing the audience to laugh and awe. Thank goodness he chipped in because I don't know what I was going to say. Anything I could say without thinking could cause harm to our families.

"Now, Katniss," he says as I look at him, "everyone saw what you did for Rue before and after she died. How you cared for her and sung her that song. It was so touching to all of us. Wasn't it folks?" Caesar asks the crowd.

The crowd responds in awes and a few cries are heard faintly.

"Who taught you the song, my dear?"

Emotions hit me like a ton of bricks in my chest. Rue reminded me so much like Prim. So young and innocent and smart just like her. I try not to let anyone see the tears that are about to slip out. I swallow, trying to steady my breathing. I knew this question was coming. I just didn't know when. "My father taught it to me years ago before he died," I say, managing to keep my voice from cracking.

"It was very beautiful. Now this next question goes out to the both of you, but Peedta I will ask you to answer first. What was going through your mind after Cato had made a deep cut in your leg and you hid by the lake side? Did you think that Katniss was going to find you?"

I slightly cringe while Caesar asks this question. Peeta must have felt me do so because he put his arm back around me. I decide to slip my shoes off again and sit back in the possition I was before.

Peeta lets out a deep breath. "Well Caesar, I can tell you that being cut that way is the worst feeling in the world. I knew it was deep just by the feel of it digging into my flesh at the time. It took me a long while to get down to the lake. I kept passing out and waking up in the middle of trying to camouflage myself. I figured that someone would find me at some point and I didn't think it would have been Katniss." I feel Peeta squeeze my hand. "I was thinking that it would be one of the other tributes that would finish me off instead of the one tribute, who's the love of my life, saving me instead."

The crowd awes as well as Caesar. Peeta lifts my hand with his and kisses it before bringing it back to my lap.

"Katniss, what did you think?" Caesar asks eagerly.

I pause for a moment, trying to think of the best way to answer. "I was hoping he wouldn't die on me. I didn't have a clue on what I was doing at the time, and I wasn't sure what I did was good enough."

"He most certainly is alive and well now," he beams. The crowd cheers. "How is your new leg working out?"

"New leg?" I barely say. _What? Why does he have a new leg?_ It hits me and I feel sick. I bend down to lift his left pant leg up slightly only to see the metal and plastic device that replaces his flesh. There wasn't anything I could do to heal him. I've tried everything and he has a new leg. _I've failed._

"No one told you?" Caesar asks.

"I never got the chance to," Peeta says, looking at me sadly, then looks back at Caesar. "It's a lot different, but I'm getting used to it slowly. I'm sure in time I will be back to normal." He smiles.

"Indeed you will," Caesar chimes back.

"It's all my fault because I used the tourniquet," I say.

"Yes, its your fault I'm alive," he says while squeezing my hand again.

"He's right. He'd have bled to death for sure without it."

I guess that is true, and I can't help that I'm about to cry. I mustn't cry now. I can cry later. I wipe a few tears from my eyes and I cuddle up against Peeta, placing my hand on his chest while gripping his shirt lightly.

After a few minutes pass, I feel myself relax. Peeta's warmth is comforting and relaxing. Our fingers are doing a little fiddling with each other as Caesar asks him another question.

"What was it like, being teamed up with the Careers while you were protecting Katniss?" Caesar asks.

"It was intense," Peeta says as he tries to think of something else to say about them. "It was hard meeting their expectations, but it was worth being with them. I'd do anything to keep her safe."

I kiss Peeta's cheek at his answer and the crowd awes.

"What were your thoughts when You were in Cato's hold near the end, being so close to death again?"

"I . . ." Peeta lets out a breath. "I was willing to give up my life if it meant Katniss lived. I had already been near death already, slower than being choked to death. I didn't know what to do, but Katniss saved me again."

"That she did," Caesar says with a smile, being too caught up in our romance. "Well, that's it tonight folks! Be sure to tune in tomorrow afternoon for their last interview!" he tells the audience. "Goodnight!"

Looking out into the crowd, I see tons of people hugging each other, crying, and laughing. I feel relieved that the questions are over and that I can finally relax and breath until tomorrow.

In a rush, Haymitch, Effie, and a few other famous Capitol people lead us to President Snow's mansion for the Victory Banquet.

During the entire time, I've had little time to eat. All of the generous sponsors, who Haymitch got to help me, are lined up, wanting their picture taken with Peeta and me. I can't help but hold Peeta's hand the entire time. The only reason being that I don't want to get lost and having him close to me makes me feel safe.

Hours pass and Effie introduces more people to us and more pictures are taken. I'm exhausted and the only person keeping me awake is the person who's still holding my hand. Peeta. How the Capitol stays up this late I will never know and I don't want to know. This is ridiculous. All of this just because the Games were won by two Victors who are in love. No wonder why Haymitch is getting drunk far worse than I've seen him.

Finally, it dies down as people start to leave. Photographers are no longer surrounding us. I see Effie dragging Haymitch along toward us.

"It's time to go!" Effie says happily, and I'm relieved.

After the ride in the elevator, Peeta and I are alone in the main area. I finally have my moment alone with him. I'm not sure what I'm going to say to him, but I do want to be alone with him.

"Time to sleep. We have a big day tomorrow," Haymitch says, mocking Effie, who isn't around to hear a she makes his way to us.

"Well, then goodnight," Peeta tells us, and I see the look of disappointment on Peeta's face. I realize he wanted to be alone with me too.

I sigh quietly to myself as Haymitch escorts me to my room.

"Why can't I talk to him?" I ask, yawning.

"Because you're tired and you have an interview at two in the afternoon tomorrow. There will plenty of time to talk when we are all back home."

"Fine. Goodnight," I say, then close my bedroom door.

If I can't talk to Peeta now, then I will simply wait until everyone goes to bed. I decide to shower to waste time, but it doesn't take much to scrub off the makeup and perfumes I've been sprayed with and wash my hair. When I finish, I dry off slowly, trying to kill some more time before I try to sneak into Peeta's room.

I dress in a long nightgown and some underwear, then comb my hair. Only fifteen minutes have passed. I sigh heavily while climbing into bed. Only twenty more and then I'll go.


	5. The Hunger Games (5)

The next time I wake up, it's morning and Effie is knocking on the door before she enters.

"We have another very big day today!" she exclaims as my prep team comes rushing in.

"You and Peeta have an interview with Caesar Flickerman at 2 PM, then it's straight to the train. We can't have you late for your arrival back home. There's a huge celebration waiting for you! It's going to be fabulous!"

"Speaking of last night, the banquet was exquisite!" Octavia says as she brushes my hair.

Effie rattles on as my team begins to fix me up while I'm trying to sneak a bite or two of the breakfast tray brought to me.

"Everyone loved you last night!"

"I can't believe this happened to us, after wondering for years what other prep teams felt like, working for Careers!"

"Just imagine the look on their faces now!"

I stay quiet and sigh to myself, and I try to smile.

A few hours pass by when they finish fixing my hair and applying little make up to my face. Cinna enters my bedroom, carrying a bag that must have the outfit I'll wear.

"Out, out," he tells my team and Effie as he shoos everyone out, leaving us alone. "We don't have a lot of time," he says quietly once the door shuts. He unzips the bag, revealing a white dress and pink shoes. It's sleeveless.

"Again?" I ask, knowing Cinna knows what I'm secretly saying.

He laughs, causing me to frown. "Not necessarily. I thought it might suit you for your lastinterview."

"Oh," is all I can say as he helps me into the dress and zips the zipper. Once Cinna finishes, he leads me across the hall into the sitting room.

I see Caesar Flickerman standing in the room, talking with the camera crew. There isn't an audience, which makes me feel better. The red velvety love seat has been moved in for Peeta and I to sit on. And there are lots of vases full of pink and white roses surrounding the love seat and the room.

I make my way through the room and Caesar immediately gives me a warm hug. "Congratulations, Katniss. How are you feeling?"

"Fine. Thanks," I say, barely managing a smile.

"Nervous about the interview?" he asks kindly. I nod. "Well, don't be. We're going to have a marvelous time. Nothing you will say will be wrong," he says, patting my cheek.

If only that were true, I think. I see Peeta entering the room, looking handsome as ever, dressed in red and white, walking to me. He pulls me off to the side. "I hardly get to see you. Haymitch seems bent on keeping us apart," he whispers.

"Yes, he's gotten very responsible lately," I say. There's too many people around to actually tell Peeta what's going on. He needs to know. His life could be at risk.

"Well, there's only this then home. He won't be able to watch us all the time," he says, leaning in closer to me, and slides his arm around my waist.

I can feel a warm fluttering feeling in my chest. Our faces are just mere inches apart and I can feel mine heating up. His hand moves to my cheek and his eyes are watching mine, searching.

"Katniss," he breathes.

"What?" I ask breathlessly. I know he's about to kiss me. I want him to kiss me. I need him to kiss me. But then he looks up toward the camera crew and releases me.

He takes my hand in his. "They're ready for us," he says, leading us to the love seat. We sit somewhat normally.

Caesar takes his seat across from us, smiling brightly. It's probably because he was watching that little moment Peeta and I were just having. "Oh, go ahead and curl up next to him if you want," he says, giving me a thoughtful smile.

At least he really believes we're in love with no question even though we aren't. _Or are we? Am I?_ I don't know what to think of that little moment between us. All I can focus on is controlling my breathing.

"It looked very sweet last night," Caesar continues as I slip off my shoes and tuck my feet in.

Peeta pulls me closer and the feelings I just had settled down bubble back up again, making me feel warmer.

A man counts backward from five and then we are broadcast live all over Panem. Caesar starts off teasing and joking and getting choked up when the occasion presents itself. He and Peeta talk nonstop and I smile and chip in little as I can. It isn't until Caesar asks questions, which calls for a bigger response.

"Well, Peeta, we know, during the days in the cave, that it was love at first sight for you from what, age five?" Caesar recalls.

"That's right. From the moment I laid eyes on her," Peeta says.

"But, Katniss, what a ride for you. I think the real excitement, especially for the audience, was watching you fall for him. When did you realize you were in love with him?" Caesar asks.

"Oh, that's a hard one . . ." I give a faint, breathy laugh and look at my hands. I don't know. When would be a good moment for them to believe I fell for Peeta? I'm still trying to figure out if I am in love with him myself.

"Well I know, when it hit me. The night when you shouted out his name from that tree," Caesar says, smiling.

 _Thank you, Caesar!_ I decide to go off that. "Yes, I guess that was it. I mean, before Claudius Templesmith announced that two tributes from the same district could win, I closed off my feelings. I was afraid that I actually cared about him. Once I was in the tree and heard it, everything changed," I say.

"Why do you think that was?" Caesar urges.

"Maybe because for the first time. . . . there was a chance I could keep him," I say.

Behind a cameraman, I see Haymitch letting out a sigh of relief and I know I've said the right thing. Caesar takes a moment and pulls out his handkerchief because he is so moved.

I feel Peeta press his forehead into my temple. "So now that you've got me, what are you going to do with me?" he asks.

I turn into him so that both of our foreheads are touching. "Put you somewhere you can't get hurt," I whisper, then he kisses me. I have that warm, butterfly feeling in my stomach. My body is warming and I don't want to part from our kiss, but the sighs in the room and someone, I assume Haymitch, makes a slight cough causes us to.

Caesar then talks about the other ways we got hurt in the arena that weren't mentioned last night from burns, to stings, to wounds, leading to the last question of the interview.

"Now it's a shame we couldn't talk about this last night, but Katniss, the moment when you pulled out those berries, what was going on in your mind?"

I pause and think for a long moment. This could the true undoing if I don't answer this right. This is the moment where I either challenged the Capitol or went so crazy at the idea of losing Peeta that I couldn't be held responsible for my actions. "I just couldn't bear the thought . . . of being without him," I finally say.

"Peeta, anything to add?" Caesar asks.

"I think that goes for both of us," he says.

I hear a few awes from the crew again and Caesar then signs off. Everyone is crying and laughing, but I'm not relieved until I reach Haymitch. "Okay?" I whisper.

"Perfect," he answers.

After Caesar and the camera crew clear the area and leave, I rush to my room to change my clothes and father my belongings before we leave for the car taking us all to the train.

It's not long before we're there. I can't help but feel a little disappointed that I didn't get to say goodbye to everyone even though I'll see them in six months for the Victory Tour in late November.

Once we're on the train, it's just the four of us. There's a huge feast set out for us and we eat in silence, all of us unsure of what to say except Effie. By the time we finish up, the television is showing our interview all over Panem.

"You two look so adorable together," Effie exclaims. "You'll be the talk for weeks! Just wait until the Victory Tour just around the corner. Everyone will be dying for the dish of you too!"

 _Will my feelings work themselves out before then? What if I'm not in love with Peeta?_ How we've been going on for the last two days will hurt him. _What if I'm in love with him? Do I simply continue what I've been doing?_ I sigh heavily and excuse myself to my room.

I take a quick shower, washing away the makeup on my face, the perfumes and lotion on my body, and the many hair products that was in my hair. Once I get out, I put on a dark blue t-shirt and some jeans. I braid my hair to the side and put on my leather boots.

I leave my bedroom and head toward the back of the train where the roof comes out like a big huge window that meets the seats and surrounds it. I sit sideways, pulling my knees to my chest, and wrap my arms around my legs. I rest my head on my knees as I stare out the window, watching the Capitol signs fade away.

For once in the last few weeks, I'm finally able to rest easy and think about home. About my mother and Prim and Gale. How life will be different now that I've won the Games. How Prim is alive. How she will be well now that she doesn't have to starve. Hoping that my mother will be happy again and be more lively . . .

The train suddenly comes to a stop, disrupting my thoughts. I'm slightly alarmed and feel like President Snow is watching me, reminding me there's still danger.

I quickly make it back to the main room and there's Peeta heading in my direction. "Do you want to take a little walk?" he asks. "It's going to take almost an hour to fuel up the train. Haymitch said he would get us if we weren't back in time to leave again."

"Sure," I say.

We head out the side door and walk down the tracks. Without thinking, I take Peeta's hand in mine. I'm unsure of what to say now that we're alone. I can't even recall what I wanted to talk to him about the night before.

He stops and gathers a bunch of wildflowers and presents them to me. I can't help but smile even if the pink and white flowers are the tops of wild onions. It makes me think of the long hours I've spent with Gale in the woods. I will be seeing him in a matter of hours. The idea makes me sick and I don't know why. It's not like I've done anything wrong. All I have done was to keep me safe and Peeta, in the end. It's not like I'm in love with Gale or anything. I only feel like I've been lying to someone who trusts me, though. Well two people, in fact. I've gotten away with it so far thanks to the Games, but now there are no more Games to hide behind back home.

"What's wrong?" Peeta asks.

"Nothing," I answer, trying to hide my thoughts.

"Okay," he says. I feel bad for not telling him while we walk further down the tracks in silence. I wonder if Peeta is having the same thoughts I'm having.

It feels like more than hour has gone by in silence. Suddenly, I feel a hand on my shoulder and there's one on Peeta's as well because we both jump and turn around, shocked and looking a bit terrified. It's Haymitch. I was too deep in my thoughts, not noticing his footsteps.

"Whoa, calm down you two. Just wanted to tell you great job and remind you to keep it up in the District until the cameras are gone. Then we should be okay."

I know exactly what he means while Peeta looks slightly confused. I watch Haymitch head back to the train, avoiding Peeta's gaze, and start to head back. I feel a tug on my hand, reminding me our fingers are still entwined.

"What's he mean?" Peeta asks.

I turn to look at him. "It's the Capitol. They didn't like our act with the berries," I blurt out without thinking.

"Wait? What are you talking about?"

I decide to tell him the truth. "It seemed too rebellious. Haymitch has been coaching me through the last few days, so I wouldn't make it any worse."

"Coaching you . . . but not me?"

I sigh. He's getting upset. I wish I kept my mouth shut after all. Silence was so much better. "He knew you were smart enough to get it right."

"I didn't know there was anything to get right," he nearly yells. "So, what you're saying is, these last few days and then I guess . . . back in the arena . . . that was just some strategy you two worked out?"

"No. I mean, I couldn't even talk to him in the arena, could I?" I stammer.

"But you knew what he wanted you to do, didn't you?" I bite my lip. "Katniss?" He drops my hand and steps away from me. I feel alone at the loss of contact.

"It was all for the Games, how you acted." He looks hurt. I don't know what to do. I just know I'm only making it worse.

"Not all of it," I say, tightly holding my flowers.

"Then how much?" he asks, pausing for a moment. Before I try to speak, he continues. "No, forget that. I guess the real question is what's going to be left when we get home?"

"I don't know. The closer we get to Twelve the more confused I get. I don't know what I feel. Peeta I . . ."

"Come one, you two!" I hear Haymitch hollering out to us.

"Well, let me know when you work it out," he says with pain in his voice. He begins to head back and I stand there, taking in what just happened. I give him a few more minutes before I begin to walk, keeping myself at a distance.

When I'm back on the train, Peeta is in his room. I head to mine with my thoughts. Every few minutes I want to go to Peeta and tell him that it'd be pointless to want to be with me, because I don't want to get married or have children. I've never planned for it after my father died. If I did have feelings for Peeta, I wouldn't ever be able to afford the kind of love that leads to a family, to children.

He'd just end up hating me sooner than later in our relationship if we ever did. Sure, every kiss and hug and closeness that we had during the interviews sent feelings through me that I don't even understand yet. And I know my father didn't second guess himself when he was alive with my mother and she didn't either.

A knock on my door disrupts my thoughts. It's Haymitch. "We're here. Just a little while longer and then everything will be alright," he says.

I wish that were true.

I fix my hair and meet Peeta. He gives me a slight smile. I already want to tell him how much I missed him in the last few hours, but that wouldn't be fair on my part. He extends out his hand. "One more time for the audience?" he says, voice full of sadness. Already the boy with the bread is slipping away from me and I feel lonely and cold inside.

I take his hand, holding on tightly, as if I'm holding on for my life, preparing for the cameras, and dreading the moment when I finally have to let go.


	6. The Six Months (1)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have decided to pair Gale/Madge together. Kisses and things that happen between Gale and Katniss will not happen here due to the main pairing in this story.
> 
> As for Prim, I realize she might be a little out of character, but let's face it, she needs all the happiness she deserves before what happened to her in Mockingjay happens.

It's been three months since Peeta and I won the Hunger Games. Three months since I last talked to him about anything. Three months since we've kissed, hugged, or did anything to convince the Capitol of our love.

I'm in the meadow. The cool October breeze is comforting. The sun is disappearing fast as it turns into night and the breeze is picking up. I'm alone. I killed a lot of squirrels, more than I need, and it's already too late for me to go trade. I can't help but sit here in deep thought, which I've done a lot of over these past few months.

I keep thinking about the kiss Peeta and I shared during the interview. The one where we kissed for a couple of minutes with a roaring crowd and everyone over Panem watching. I keep thinking of how my body reacted, leaving me wanting more and my body tingling. How soft his hair was and how good he smelt. How his fingers were in my hair, his palm touching my cheek. How tight he was holding me against him, feeling his muscles pressed against me. Hearing faint moans escape from both of us. It had felt as if we were the only two people in the world at the moment until Haymitch pulled us away. He's always getting in the way in those moment.

When I came back from the Capitol, Gale told me about how he and Madge Undersee were together. Thinking about them, they do make a cute couple. For years I've known Madge had a crush on him. A few times I mentioned it Gale, but he would laugh it off. Now, he's in love with her and he's happy.

I've come to realize that Gale and I are truly and only friends. I'm not disappointed. I was relieved when I found out. He wasn't mad at how I acted with Peeta, but he was disappointed when I told him it was all an act even though he understood. He knows how I feel about anything dealing with love.

Our Sundays mostly consist of hunting and checking his snares, which has always been our normal routine. It's when we get to the Hob or when we're in town that Madge gets dragged into our day. The way they are together, you can tell that they're in love.

He holds her hand and kisses her, teasing and joking every once in a while. She blushes and giggles at everything he does and hangs on to every word. She fears for his safety when he works in the mine, and I admit, I do too. Madge will sometimes ask me and how Peeta and I are doing. And I lie, telling her that we are good, then Gale jumps in and changes the conversation. He's the only person who knows how Peeta and I truly are and he promised he wouldn't tell anyone, especially Madge.

It isn't until recently that I've wondered what a true relationship with Peeta would be like. He's kind and he's loving. He's sweet and charming. His hair is perfect and his eyes are the perfect shade of blue. He's taller than me and muscular. I know if I had confessed my love to him right away after that conversation off the train, he probably wouldn't believe me.

Now if I was standing at his doorstep, he would probably laugh at me and hate me even more. I know he'd be kind and loving, and it would be difficult for me to let go of my fears of losing him. But I don't have him now, and if I do go right up to his door and he turns me down, would my heart break? I wouldn't lose him as a lover, but maybe as a friend. Maybe we aren't friends anymore. Our exchanges for meat and bread have always been so cold. Only five words are said on both ends, then we go our separate ways.

The sun is going down and the temperature is dropping. Becoming a bit cold, I decide to head home, the new home the Capitol has provided. I enter inside and can tell that my mother and Prim are in the kitchen.

"Hey, honey," my mother calls out.

"Hi," I say. "I've got a lot of meat. Sorry I was gone so long." I know she doesn't like me out after dark and out beyond the fence. Prim runs to me, hugging me tightly. She shortly releases me and I walk over to my mom, handing her the bag.

"Oh wow, Katniss. Maybe you should go invite Haymitch and Peeta over. It's been a long while since we've invited them over," my mother says. She pauses for a minute, expecting me to say something.

What can I say? Haymitch is likely passed out drunk and Peeta could be having his own dinner or be with his family.

"And now that your tour is coming up . . ."

"Sure," I interrupt, not wanting to hear anymore. "I'll be back."

I head back out the front door and a few steps ahead I reach Haymitch's home. I knock on the door a few times and there's no answer. I try the doorknob and it's unlocked. I open the door slowly and creep in, knocking bottles over on the ground. "Haymitch?"

"What do you want?" he yells. I hear a few glasses break. He's drunk as usual. How a person can live like this I will never know.

"Would you like to have dinner with my family tonight?" I ask. I take a few more steps and see him sitting on the couch.

"Is lover boy gonna be there?"

"I don't know. I haven't asked him yet." _Why does he want to know that?_

"Then no."

"Fine. Have a nice night." I say, walking away, opening the door again.

"Yeah, you too, sweetheart," he says, then I'm out the door.

I walk over a few more feet, reaching Peeta's home. I knock on his door and it opens it.

There he is standing in front of his doorway. He looks handsome even though his hair is messed up and his shirt has flour stains on it.

"Hey Katniss. What's up?" he asks.

"Would you like to have dinner with my family tonight?" I ask, smiling for some odd reason. He always has that effect on me.

"Sure. Just let me go change real quick."

"You look fine the way you are," I blurt out. _What is wrong with me? Why did I just say that?_

Peeta laughs. Now I think he thinks I'm an idiot.

"Thanks, Katniss, but I don't think your mother wants me tracking flour through the house." He's smiling and I feel my stomach doing flips. "I'll be right back. You can come in if you want. You don't have to wait out in the cold."

"Thanks," I say, walking inside while Peeta heads upstairs to change. This is the first time I've ever entered his house. I notice that it's the same set up as mine. _I wonder if the Capitol did this on purpose._

His house is warm and smells like cinnamon. I make my way into the kitchen and see that it's different from mine. Cabinets are everywhere and there's a smaller table. On the counter lies a plate of cookies covered in light blue icing that look freshly made

I can hear light footsteps behind me and I know it's him. "You can bring some over if you want, for Prim," he says, standing closer to me.

I look up and see his blonde hair is combed. He's wearing a jacket and I can barely see the dark green shirt underneath. I wonder if it's cold upstairs since his jacket is zipped up. I feel my cheeks blush at the thought of what his upstairs looks like. Even his bedroom. I feel a warm pool deep in my belly again. This cannot be happening.

"Thanks. She'd like that," I say while accepting an empty plate for the cookies. I pick a few of them while Peeta grabs a loaf of bread. "You ready to go?"

"Yes," I say. We exit the kitchen and head out the front door. It's gotten colder outside and I can tell that the wind has picked up as we make our way to my house.

Once we're inside, I accidentally slam the door shut, causing my mother to curse. "Sorry," I say.

"It's okay," my mother hollers from the kitchen. Prim comes running to greet me again, then stops and looks at Peeta. She is smiling up at him. _Is she amazed just as I am of his good looks?_

"We brought over some cookies for later and here's some bread," he says, handing Prim the bread loaf.

"They're pretty," Prim says, taking the plate from my hands and the bread from Peeta, bringing it to our mother.

Peeta and I take off our coats and join my sister and mother in the kitchen.

"Is Haymitch coming over?" my mother asks as she sets a stack of plates down on the counter.

"No," I say, grabbing the four plates. "I'll bring him a plate over when we're finished."

"Yes, I'm sure he would like that," she says. I sure hope so. Haymitch asking me if Peeta was coming over still bothers me. "It's ready now."

"It smells wonderful, Mrs. Everdeen," Peeta says as we all seat ourselves at the table.

"Thank you," my mother says, giving him a warm smile.

"Can you teach me how to bake?" Prim asks.

"Sure," Peeta says. "I can always use an extra pair of hands."

"Mom, may I go over there tomorrow?" Prim asks immediately. "To help Peeta?"

"That depends if you can get your sister to go with you," she says.

"Katniss! Can we? Please?" my sister begs.

"We will see, Little Duck." Prim wanting to go to the bakery and learn how to bake leaves me curious. I know she likes helping our mother tend to those who need treatment for illnesses due to the harsh winter this year, but learning how to bake isn't a bad thing.

"I'll make her come with me," Prim says to Peeta. I can see him smiling at me. Maybe spending a little more time with him might be okay after all.

Peeta hangs over for an hour more. Prim tells Peeta everything that she's been doing with Mom and half the things she says I didn't even know myself. It only reminds me more of the things I've missed since the Games ended and from being caught up in my own thoughts.

The whole time Prim and our mother talk while I stare at Peeta. He sometimes catches me staring at him and I glance away, then stare at him again when he's not looking. And sometimes I can feel a pair of eyes watching me and I know it's him. _Maybe I will tell him tonight and finally let it all go and give in to my feelings._

"Well, I should get going," Peeta says.

"See you tomorrow, Peeta!" Prim beams, her voice confident, before she starts to clean the dishes.

My mother fixes a warm plate for me to bring to Haymitch while Peeta and I are at the door, putting on our coats.

"Thanks again, Mrs. Everdeen. Dinner was wonderful," Peeta says.

"You're welcome and thank you for the bread," my mother says. "Anytime you want to come over, feel free to do so. You're always welcome here." She hands me the plate of food, then Peeta and I head out the door.

We don't say a word to each other until we're in the middle of the pathway to Haymitch's house.

"Why don't you give it to him? He didn't seem too happy with me coming over earlier," I say.

"Okay," he says, taking the plate from me. Peeta doesn't knock. He simply opens the door and shuts it again. I wonder why I didn't do so before. A few minutes later Haymitch and Peeta are in the doorway and Haymitch waves at me while Peeta walks back to me. It's weird, but I wave back.

"What was that about?" I ask after the door closes.

"Nothing at all." I can hear the smile in his voice.

When we reach his doorway, we stop. "So will I be expecting you two tomorrow?" he asks, breaking the silence that's settled over us.

"I think so," I say. I'm still not sure. I feel so nervous all of a sudden.

"Okay," he says, unlocking his door. "Well, see you then."

"See you later." I turn around and I'm about to walk away when the unexpected happens.


	7. The Six Months (2)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a lemony chapter, but there's no intercourse. Just getting intimate together is all, so you've been warned. From here on out every other chapter or so will contain it, hence the rating.

Peeta grabs my arm and pulls me into his warm embrace while his lips crash onto mine.

I'm stunned in place. I don't know what to do, but I do know that I don't want this loss to end. I feel Peeta's arms wrap around my waist as my lips move with his. My arms find their way around Peeta neck, and my fingers tangle in his hair.

My body feels like it's burning. My insides are turning and feel like they're melting. The cold, harsh wind sends chills through me, causing me to break the kiss. Peeta holds me tighter against him and looks into my eyes, searching yet again, then kisses me again without saying a word. This kiss feels like the one we shared before, but it's a lot more.

I feel his tongue brush against my lips and I allow it in, then our tongues are doing a dance. It all feels so good. I let out a moan and my arms wrap themselves tighter around him, pressing him against me even more until there isn't space between us.

His lips move to my jaw, then to my neck and near my ear. I use the moment to catch my breath as quickly as I can before he decides to kiss me again. The feeling makes my body tingle from the tips of my fingers to my toes. I let out another moan and my breathing is speeding up as he sucks on my earlobe.

"Come inside with me," he breathes in my ear.

"Okay," I pant, then he kisses me again quickly.

We let each other go, then he opens the door. Once we're both inside, escaping the cold, I shut the door and lock it. When I face Peeta again, his hands reach up to my face, then he kisses me again, pushing me up against the door. The feel of his body pressing into me drives me crazy. My fingers tug back his golden hair, and this time I'm the one deepening the kiss, slipping my tongue into his mouth.

My instincts tell me that a lot more can happen if we keep doing this. Things that people in love would do. And I realize now that I am in love with this man in front of me.

From the beginning I knew. I just couldn't express it because I of how scared and afraid I was. I'm not afraid anymore and even though I'm sure he knows now, I need to tell him I'm just as in love with him as he is in love with me before I can let this continue.

"Peeta . . ." I say breathlessly against his lips. He gives me another long kiss.

"What?" he asks while planting kisses all over my neck.

"I . . . Umm . . ." I can't find the words. I can hardly think straight with him kissing me like this. "I think . . . " I try again, only failing as I melt into his touch.

Peeta stops, looking at me. "What are you trying to say?" he laughs, then gives me another quick kiss. I frown at how quick it was.

 _Courage. Find your courage._ "I love you," I mumble out.

"What?" he asks. _He didn't hear me? Why does this have to be so complicated?_

"I said . . . I said that I . . . I love you."

Peeta stares at me and doesn't say anything for what feels like forever when only a couple of minutes have passed. It makes me feel more nervous.

"Dammit, Katniss," he says as the side of his fist hits the door next to my cheek. "Why? Why are you telling me now?" His face is a few inches from mine. I thought he was going to kiss me, but he backs away from me.

"I'm sorry," I say. I thought he would be happy. I wasn't expecting this from him. I don't know what I was expecting, honestly. I know this isn't good though.

"No. I'm sorry," Peeta says. He takes my hand and leads me to the couch in the living room.

"You told me on the last day we spent together that you wanted to know how much was true and what wasn't true . . ." I say as we sit down on the couch. "That you wanted me to let you know when I figured out my feelings. Well, I have."

"Okay. I'm listening."

I'm still holding his hand as I stare deep into his blue eyes mixed with so much emotion.

"Before, when we were in the Training Center, we were just strangers, and I didn't know what to think of you. I was angry when you told Caesar that you were in love with me. How I acted in the arena . . . it was all for the Games mostly. When we were in the cave and we kissed, I felt something spark inside me, but I ignored it because I was so scared for our lives. I didn't want to deal with another loss. When I pulled out the berries, it was true then. I didn't want to live without you. I already thought I might have had you, then the Gamemakers had to ruin it. When you kissed me for the first time since those four days, I felt the feeling again, but this time it felt a lot stronger. I meant that kiss. It wasn't for show. I was so worried about you," I tell him as my tears start to fall. "I didn't know whether you were truly alive or dead until that night. I didn't know what had happened to you."

I wipe my tears off my face with my sleeve, and I sniffle loudly, trying to keep the snot from running down my nose. I can hardly breathe as it is and I feel so unattractive right now, but I have to keep going.

"Katniss, I —" Peeta starts, giving my hand a squeeze.

"No. Listen, please. I need to get this out." He nods.

"It's been almost four months of nothing without you in my life. I've been so blind while trying to keep my heart safe from losing the ones I love. I couldn't fall for anyone, but I was already falling for you and I didn't even know it. You saved me countless times and you've given me hope when no one else did. I don't want to wonder anymore what my life would be like without you in it, or how it would be with you in it. I want to know. I want to be with you, Peeta. I need you. Not anyone else. You know I'm a terrible liar, so tell me if you think I'm lying," I tell him, wiping more tears from my face. I've managed to call myself down, but I'm so nervous of what he'll say and think.

Peeta is staring at me, and I feel like a fool. He hasn't said anything yet. I stare at our hands locked together, unable to stand him watching me while I'm waiting helplessly for an answer.

I let go of his hand and start to get up from the couch, but he takes my hand again, keeping me there next to him. "Katniss," he says, placing his hand on my cheek, which causes me to meet his gaze. "I believe you. I really do. I love you, too."

He closes the space between us, then his lips are on mine. It's a slow sweet, passionate kiss. Both his hands are on both of my cheeks. I move closer to him, which causes him to lean back into the couch. One of his hands moves to the side of my waist and I decide to move on top of him.

Both of my legs are on the sides of his as I'm sitting in his lap. His hands travel down to my waist, and my hands are on the back of the couch next to his head as our kisses grow more intense.

I can feel Peeta's hands slipping under the hem of my shirt, touching my stomach lightly. It makes me flinch.

He breaks the kiss. "Is this okay?"

"Yes," I assure him.

This time it's me who starts the kissing, but Peeta quickly takes over. I can feel his hands traveling further up my abdomen to the sides of my ribs, making me squirm. They travel up further and cup my breasts, sending shivers through my body and making me moan.

"God, Katniss," he says. His lips go to my neck and sucks that spot again, which causes me to moan louder than before.

"Peeta," I pant, unable to find the words of what I want to say. I catch his lips with mine and this time it's hard and full of passion. He wraps his arms around me and moves us so that I am now lying on my back with him on top of me, our lips still connected. I feel his hands slid my shirt up, exposing more of my bare skin, and I lift up so he can take it off.

He presses me back down on the couch, then I can feel the hardness of him pressing against me there. I know exactly what it is and I'm glad that I'm the one causing this reaction from him.

I wrap my right leg around his waist and reach down to take off his shirt, scratching his back with my nails as I lift up his shirt. Peeta let's out a loud moan, a moan I haven't heard before, and I desperately want to hear it again. Once his shirt is off, I claw his back again while his mouth is sucking my neck, making us both moan loudly.

His hands trail up my sides, leaving a heated trail. My body feels as if it's on fire. I don't want this stop. It all feels so good and oh, so right. I feel his teeth graze my neck and jaw, causing a little pain, but it excites me at the same time. I thrust my hips against his and warmth pools at my belly.

His lips travel up my neck to my jaw, then reaches my lips. It's a slower, shortened kiss, then he breaks away, staring down at me. "Can I try something?"

I nod, unable to say anything. I've never felt this way before and I don't want it to stop. I'm wanting more and I have a feeling Peeta is about to give me more, and I'm okay with that. I trust him completely.

"Just tell me when you want me to stop. I don't want to do something you don't want to do. Promise me?"

"I promise," I say while tangling my fingers in his hair. I pull him in for a kiss as his fingers slide my right bra strap off my shoulder, freeing my breast. His mouth trails kisses on my skin, then his lips are around my nipple, sending shocks and warmth through me. I arch my back at the hot sensation and let one of my hands play in his hair while I move the other down his waist to the bulge in his pants.

Peeta moans loudly and grabs my wrist, stopping me, and brings it above my head. "I want this to be about you first before me," he says darkly. Chills run down my spine, making me shiver. I know exactly what he means and I want it too.

He frees my hands and I place them on his shoulders because I'm not sure where else to put them at the moment. I feel him undo the button and zipper of my pants, then I his hand slipping into my pants. "Peeta!" I moan as I arch my back, pressing myself into him as I feel his fingers start to rub my folds.

I feel heat rise in my body. I'm gasping for air as he kisses me and continues to work on my spot, feeling something starting to build inside me. "Peeta," I cry out.

"Does this feel good?" he asks, his voice husky in my ear.

"Oh God, yes," I moan out. My reply urges him on and I feel his fingers starting to rub faster as I'm getting close.

Once my orgasm hits me, I cry out his name. I lift head up and kiss him carelessly. He lays his head on my chest and I lay there with my eyes closed. I'm unsure of what to say afterwards. "That was amazing," I say, feeling stupid because that's all I can come up with. I don't know what you say after these kinds of things.

"I've got a lot more planned when we have more time together," he says. I blush at the thought of doing other activities related to this with Peeta.

"You should head home. Your mother is probably worried about you."

"Yeah, I should probably get going. I wish I could stay with you."

"Me too," he says, then he kisses me.

We then get up from the couch and I fix my bra strap and put my shirt back on.

We get up from the couch, then I fix my bra strap and put my shirt back on while Peeta does the same. After we're both dressed, we make our way to the door.

"I'm sorry again . . . for waiting so long," I say, putting my hunting jacket on.

"Don't be," Peeta says while pulling me into a hug. "What matters now is that we are finally together and happy. No more dreading." I give him a quick kiss.

"I'd walk you to your door, but it'd be a bit suspicious and you've been gone for a while."

"No, yeah, it's okay." My face blushes. "I love you, Peeta," I say, looking deep into his blue eyes.

He smiles. "I love you too, Katniss."

We kiss for a couple more minutes in his doorway, then I leave. When I reach my house, I notice nobody is awake as I close the door gently, then I head upstairs. I change into my night clothes, then climb in bed as I process my thoughts.

I am truly happy. My father once told me that he wanted me to be happy like my mother was with him and I finally made his wish come true. Peeta Mellark is the love of my life, and we are finally in each other's life with nothing holding us back.


	8. The Six Months (3)

It's early morning, and I feel the happiest I've ever been in a long time. I get out of bed and dress quickly, then braid my hair. I look in the mirror and see a dark bruise on the side of my neck.

My body warms and tingles at the memory of Peeta's lips kissing, sucking, and biting me there. _I'm going to kill him later, especially if anyone notices,_ I think to myself though I blush at the thought.

I decide to leave my hair down because of the marks on my neck. I glance at myself once more in the mirror, then I go to wake Prim.

"Come on, sleepy head. You have five minutes to get dressed before I change my mind to go to Peeta's." I tickle Prim, which causes her to squeal.

"Really? We're gonna go to the bakery?" she asks happily.

"Yeah, let's go," I say, giving her a smile. I leave her room and head downstairs. As I walk into the kitchen, I see my mom sitting at the kitchen table drinking some coffee.

"Morning."

"Good morning, darling. You didn't stay out too late last night, did you?" she asks, frowning.

I blush, remembering all that happened last night. "No. Not at all."

"Good." My mother smiles. _I wonder if she suspects anything._

"I'm ready!" Prim says as she makes her way down the stairs. I head over to the front door and put on my coat. Instantly, I flip my hair over the collar of the coat.

"Katniss, what is that on your neck?" Prim asks curiously.

"Nothing. It's just a bruise," I say quickly. _Now I'm really going to kill him._

"Katniss," my mother calls out. I know she's heard Prim and she'll likely ask me questions later.

"We'll be back later. Come on, Prim. Let's go." I open the front door and rush my sister out before I close the door behind us.

"How'd you get the bruise?" I see her smiling at me as we walk to the bakery.

 _She won't leave this alone, will she?_ Fooling around with Peeta is not the answer I want to give her. "It was an accident . . . last night when I came home," I say slowly, hoping she believes me. "I fell."

"I didn't hear anything."

"That's because you were asleep, Little Duck."

"I really couldn't sleep last night, and the only noises I heard were your sneaky footsteps up the stairs and to your room."

Crap. "I . . . umm . . ." I'm at a loss for words. _Think._ "Prim, you'll understand when you're older."

"Okay," she pouts. "Does it involve Peeta?"

"Prim!" I yell out. _Why won't she hush up?_ She's too clever, and I love her for it.

"Okay, I'll stop. I'm sorry."

"It's okay, Little Duck." Now I feel bad that I made her feel bad about asking me questions. _Shouldn't I be able to tell her about Peeta and I?_ I frown. I decide to try to make her smile. "Are you excited about today?" I look down at Prim as we're halfway into town leading to the bakery. There's a smile on her face and I know succeed.

"Yes! Thank you for coming with me!"

"Anything for you, Little Duck." I place my arm around her shoulders and we walk like this the rest of the way.

It's not long before we're at the bakery. "Hey Peeta!" Prim beams as we walk inside the Mellark Bakery.

"Hey Prim. Hey Katniss," Peeta says. He's wearing khaki pants and a light blue shirt. The shade of blue brings out the color in his eyes, those eyes that I could look into forever. They shine bright into the sun as it shines through the door and the windows. He's so handsome. My eyes travel to his lips as he's talking to Prim, and I'm suddenly wishing that my sister isn't here so that I can kiss him. I don't see why I can't while she's here. It's not like she hasn't seen people kiss before. I just don't want to start another conversation, like how she mentioned my neck. I feel the blush on my face and neck. I'm suddenly feeling hot everywhere and decide to remove my jacket.

Prim is tugging on my arm. "Hmm?" I say dreamily, wishing his lips were on mine now and not talking.

"Peeta just asked you a question." Prim is smiling at me ridiculously. She must have some clue now.

"He did?" My face reddens. "What? I'm sorry." _Pull it together._

"What would you like to learn how to make?" Peeta asks again, throwing his dashing smile toward me. _Love_ , I think to myself. Surely I can't tell him that, but I want to. _Is that too forward?_ I blush again. It will never end.

"Well, I'm here just for Prim. Whatever she wants to make, then you can teach me, too," I say, giving him a smile.

"Just for Prim?" he laughs and looks hurt, playfully. I know he's messing with me. I feel my face blush more.

"And for you too." I grin.

"Well Katniss, grab some aprons over there on the rack. Prim, you can get yourself used to the cabinets back here behind the counter. We're going to make blueberry muffins since you love them so much."

"Yay!" Prim cheers. Her smile is bright, and she's happy.

Peeta and my sister are getting along great. They are joking and laughing and making a huge mess in the kitchen. When the muffin mix is all mixed up, they both try placing muffin mix on my face or anywhere they can, but I send them a death glare.

I lean back against the counter as I watch them get back to work. After the muffin mix is in the pan, Prim adds the blueberries, then Peeta sets a timer while Prim carefully sets the pan in the oven.

"Help yourself to the cookies in the display case," Peeta says as he removes the glass lid.

"The smell of the muffins are making me hungry," Prim admits, walking over to the counter to take a cookie.

I pick out one with green icing, then walk over to the widow display. The cake designs take my breath away. I never noticed how marvelous they looked before. Peeta is truly talented.

Peeta walks up behind me and wraps his arm around my waist, holding me close against him. "Maybe I will make you one for your birthday," he says.

"When we are training next year's tributes? You won't have time for that . . . We won't have time for that." I frown. Seven months from now is the Third Quarter Quell, and Peeta and I will be the new mentors alongside Haymitch.

"We'll find time, but we don't have to worry about that now," he breathes in my ear, and I feel goosebumps form on my skin. The timer rings, making me jump. It surprises me how easily I can get lost around Peeta.

"They're done!" Prim exclaims.

Peeta walks over and hands her an oven mitt. He opens the oven for her, then Prim carefully takes the muffins out.

"They smell amazing," I say as the blueberry smell fills the room.

"And they'll taste just as good," Prim beams.

We let the muffins sit for a couple of minutes before we start to eat them.

"Can we make a dozen more?" Prim asks after she finishes a bit of a muffin.

"I don't see why not," he tells her, giving her a smile. "Let me go get the supplies from the supply closet and then we can use the larger oven in the back."

"Okay," she says, bouncing on the balks of her feet.

Peeta comes back in less than a minute, carrying more blueberries and flour. He leads us to the back where there's more baking area and a larger oven. Pots and pans hang from the ceiling, and I'm sure the cabinets hold even more pots and pans and the needed utensils. Prim takes the lead this time, pouring flour and milk into a mixing bowl while Peeta does the same in another. It isn't long before all of the ingredients are mixed up and back in the oven.

— • — • — • — • — • — • — 

It's late afternoon when the three of us head home, carrying large plates carrying the two and a half dozen of muffins Peeta and Prim made. I invited Peeta to dinner again tonight, and I'm nervous about it. I'm unsure of what will happen, but honestly, I'd like another chance to repeat what happened last night. The thought of it makes me blush.

"What are you thinking about?" Peeta whispers when Prim is a little ahead of us.

"Nothing at all," I tell him, biting my lip. Heat travels down my neck to my feet.

"Something," he says, smiling as his fingers brush against mine. I know he's teasing me.

"Stuff." It's all I can say as I'm at a loss for words. My stomach is in knots as I try not to think about last night's activities. "I love you," I tell him.

"I love you too," he says, walking close next to me, and kisses my temple.

It doesn't take us long when we reach home. I find my mom in the kitchen, starting to make a stew for dinner, and Peeta rushes to her side and starts to cut up the vegetables while my mom cuts up the meat.

I can't help but grin lazily as I watch my mom and Peeta get along well in the kitchen. Prim nudges my arm with her elbow from time to time, but every time I look at her she's smiling at me, causing me to blush.

An hour passes by when dinner is ready. There's only a little of the bread loaf left that Peeta brought over last night, but we manage to divide it equally amongst us. While we eat Prim fills our mother in about our day at the bakery. Throughout the story, our mother _really_ laughs for the first time in years. It's only one of the few good things that come out of me winning the Games.

"Thank you again for letting me over for dinner," Peeta says when we're all done with dinner. "It's getting later, so I should probably head home."

"I'll walk with you. I can make up another plate and give it to Haymitch." _I wonder if he's eaten since last night_ , I think to myself as I make up a plate of stew.

"Peeta, would you instead?" my mother asks. "I know it's late and that the temperature has dropped . . ."

"Of course, Mrs. Everdeen," Peeta says, giving her a smile, then slips on his shoes.

I try to hide my disappointment as I make my way to the front door. Peeta is standing there ready to leave, and I wish I could leave with him too or make him stay. "Goodnight," I tell him, handing him the warm plate.

"There's always tomorrow," he whispers darkly in my ear before kissing my cheek. "I'll see you tomorrow. I love you," he says, then he's out the door.


	9. The Six Months (4)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Warning: Peeta's mother is a bit abusive in this chapter since there's a hint of that in both books and movies. I just took it and ran with it. It's not super descriptive. She's only forceful, attempts to hit, and uses strong language at Katniss and Peeta, so if this is something you're not interested in then skip it. It's about halfway into the chapter that it starts.

The next morning I head out early to hunt in the freezing cold. Snow flurries fall all around, adding more accumulation to the snow. I manage to kill one turkey and a lot of squirrels.

I drop off some of the game at home, then check up on Haymitch. I open the door quietly and the smell liquor is everywhere in the house. As I walk further into the house, I see Haymitch passed out drunk on the couch, then make my way into his kitchen. Dirty dishes and empty glass bottles are everywhere. I go through his cabinets, looking for more alcohol, and find none. I make a mental note, reminding myself to clean up his place for him and buy more liquor for him. After all he's done for Peeta and I, it's the least I can do for him.

As I make my way into town, I give what I have from my hunting trip to Graesy Sae and a few others in town. I buy five bottles of liquor for Haymitch and two bottles from my mother for when she needs it for patients. A few light blue and green ribbons catch my eye, and I decide to buy a few for Prim that she can wear in her hair or add to her outfits. I know how much she likes the little things like that.

Once I finish, I decide to go see Peeta at the bakery. I head inside, and it's Peeta's father that greets me. "Hello, Katniss," he says, giving me a smile.

"Good afternoon, Mr. Mellark," I say, returning the smile. "Is Peeta here?"

"Sure. Let me go get him for you." He leaves the counter and goes somewhere in the back. I can hear a little commotion.

A minute later, Peeta returns with his father. "Hey, Katniss."

"Hey, Peeta." I do a little wave with my fingers and feel my face turning red.

"Dad, is it alright if Katniss comes back here to help? I'll make sure she won't get in the way of things." Peeta sends me a quick wink and I blush.

"I don't see why no," Mr. Mellark says, smiling. "I'm sure you have more free time now, being a Victor."

He has no idea how true that is with Gale working hard in the mines and me, having everything I've ever needed at home now. I know Mr. Mellark is leaving out my hunting activities, but I haven't had to get as much game as before.

"Thanks, Dad."

"Have fun, you two," Mr. Mellark says as he begins cleaning the front of the bakery.

Peeta takes my hand and leads me to the back. We're back where we were yesterday when Prim was with us, only this time the large wooden counters are full of trays, mixing bowls, utensils, and ingredients. The large oven has pastries cooking, filling air with cinnamon and vanilla. Flour is scattered all over the place.

"You've been busy," I tell him, crossing my arms.

"Yeah," he laughs. "Would you like to help me finish making cookies? They're for a birthday party down the road. There's enough batter for extras, so you can bring them home, if you'd like.

_So this is what he does during his free time. Make the younger children's day brighter._ "Sure," I say, smiling brightly.

Peeta hands me a dark apron and leads me to the counter. He grabs two handfuls of dough from the bowl and sets it in front of me, then brings over a bowl full of flour. He covers his hands and the open counter with the flour.

I watch him, wondering why he's doing such a thing. I don't understand at all.

"It keeps the dough from sticking," he says, picking up on my lack of knowledge.

"Oh," I say, biting my lip. He smiles at me.

Peeta moves close behind me, making me to shiver. His hands find mine and places them on the counter, then he rubs flour over my hands and rest them next to the dough. As he reaches around me to find the rolling-pin, I feel his lower body pressing up against me, causing me to bite my lip to keep myself from moaning.

"Roll out the dough," he says as his hands move back on top of mine, guiding the rolling-pin as I move it. "That's good," he says once the dough starts to become thinner and wider. Peeta lets go of my hands when the timer goes off and takes the two cookie pans out of the oven while I continue to move the rolling-pin back and forth over the dough, causing the dough to smooth out evenly and become thinner.

"Is this good enough?" I ask once he's done placing the warm cookies on a cooling sheet.

"It's perfect," he says, walking back to me. "Now it's ready to cut." Peeta picks up a circular-type-thing that he calls a cookie cutter. "You just take this and press it down on the dough, then lift it back up and place the freed dough on the pan," he says as he shows me how to do it once more.

He hands me another cookie cutter, then we start putting circles all over the dough and place the cookies on the pan.

"Now what?" I ask curiously. All that is left is the remains.

"Now we get to roll up the dough and flatten it out again," he says as he gathers up the dough. He takes another handful of flour and spreads it everywhere, then he begins to roll the dough into a round ball. "Just like before," he tells me as he sets the dough in front of me.

I pick up the rolling-pin again and start to roll it out while Peeta puts two more cookie pans in the oven, then I feel his body heat against me and see his hands back on mine. I try to keep myself from moaning at the closeness of us and the feel of his hardness pressing firmly into my backside.

Peeta's hands start wandering up my arms to my shoulders and down my back to my hips. His kisses feather down my neck, and I rest my head on his shoulder, granting him more access, as I get lost in his touch. A low moan escapes my lips when Peeta bites my neck playfully.

As I let go of the rolling-pin, I turn my body and place my right hand on his left cheek, moving his head so that he is looking at me. I get up on my tiptoes and kiss his lips.

His hands firmly grip my hips as he turns my body, making me face him completely. He lifts me up and sets me on the counter away from the dough and dishes without our lips breaking apart. I wrap my legs around his waist and pull him closer to me, a moan escaping his lips. When he breaks the kiss, I whimper at the loss of contact, then I moan when his lips are on my neck again as he unties my apron.

"Do you want to go somewhere?" he asks as I start to lift up his shirt.

"Where?" I look at him questionably. _Where could we possibly go where no one would notice?_

"Do you trust me?"

I nod, then he gives me a quick kiss. He helps me off the counter and takes my hand, leading me somewhere. The thought of sneaking around in an open place excited me, which sends a new feeling through my body.

Peeta leads us into a supply closet where extra utensils, flour, sugar, and other baking supplies I can't name are kept. He quickly shuts the door and locks it.

"Won't someone find us?" I ask, looking at the shelves, then back at him.

"No. After winning the Games, I bought extra supplies so the bakery wouldn't run out. No one comes in here for anything since the place is stocked. We'll be fine."

"Okay," I say, then his lips capture mine. I push him up against the closet door and tug off his shirt. It isn't long before mine follows his down on the ground.

His fingers slip under my bra straps and slides them down my shoulders. My fingers tangle in his hair as his lips suck and bite my neck, sending fire down to my core.

I remember that's where he kept kissing me the other night. The mark on my neck is almost invisible and I don't want it surfacing back up. I pull on his hair to get his attention. "Peeta." I can hardly breathe. I try again. "Not there, Peeta. Prim kept questioning me on it."

"Then where?" he asks as his lips travel to my shoulder. "Here or here?" His lips travel over my collarbone down to the middle of my chest.

I moan in response and feel him smiling against my skin. His breath is warm against my skin, tying my stomach in glorious knots and rushing heat over my body.

"Please . . ." I pant, begging for something unnamed.

Peeta's lips travel down to my stomach, and I let out a giggle. _Why would I be giggling at a time like this? It's so unattractive,_ I think. I can't help it as he continues to place kisses all over my stomach. I squirm as his lips brush against the waistband of my jeans. His fingers tug at my jeans playfully, and then the stops, heading the door knob jiggling.

Someone's unlocking the door. I freeze in place.

"Dammit," Peeta mumbles under his breath. "I swear my brothers weren't working today." He picks up our shirts off the ground and hands me mine.

As we put our shirts back on, I'm still tugging down mine and fixing my bra straps when Mrs. Mellark opens the door, looking furious. I'm afraid for mine and Peeta's life. Five years ago, I watched her hit and yell at Peeta because he had burnt bread; the bread that saved my family from starvation. Now I wonder what's going to happen.

"What the hell are you two doing in this closet!" Mrs. Mellark screams. "Why are you with this fucking Seam slut when you could be screwing some better girl here!" she yells, pointing a finger at me.

I want to defend myself, but Peeta grabs my hand, calming me down.

"Don't you ever talk to Katniss that way again, Mother," Peeta spits back.

"She doesn't even love you! She just sleeps with you to get to you, so that she'll have you wrapped around her finger and use you. She's no good for you or for this fam—"

"That's enough! I will not allow you to tell me who I can love and who I can sleep with. It's no concern of yours, and I'll have you know we are greatly in love unlike you and Dad." His mother's face is full of anger and disgust. I never wanted to meet this woman after I saw what she did to him years ago.

"What's going on in here?" Mr. Mellark asks, his voice full of concern, as he rushes to us. He looks surprised seeing is in the closet but doesn't say anything.

"You're son is in here fucking this no-good Seam slut when he knows that we've got orders that need to go out! Oh! And their in love!" She laughs. "Can you believe that? After she treated him like crap, oh, how much is he paying you anyways, whore? Why have him when you can have that Gale Hawthorne? Everyone thought you'd end up with him, but why an idiot like my son?" She looks at Peeta with disgust. "You could have done so much better with your life than be with this —"

I cut her off. I can't hold it in anymore. I'm boiled up with so much anger towards this woman, I will not stand her torture any more.

"I am in love with your son, more than you know," I say, cutting her off. I am fired up with so much anger towards this woman, I can't stand her torture anymore. "He saved my life five years ago and gave me hope to keep on living. That day you treated him like shit and beat him down. You know, you were right, saying that I'd win the Hunger Games, but I didn't make it by myself. It was Peeta, too.

Your son has so much strength and kindness and you're too messed up to realize it and to see it for yourself. I didn't want to think about love. He was too perfect, but I fell under his spell. You truly have a wonderful son." Tears fall from my eyes, due to my anger towards his mother and the love that I have for Peeta. I feel him give my hand a squeeze.

Mrs. Mellark stands there, stunned in place and outraged from my words. I try to hide the smile creeping on my face.

"Peeta, take your girlfriend home and take the day off." His father sends us both an apologetic look.

"Peeta, take Katniss home and take the rest of the day off." His father sends us both an apologetic look.

I feel bad for Peeta and his brothers and their father for having to deal with their family member like this. It's bad enough when your mother won't take care of you like a mother should, but it's worse when a mother is abusive and mistreats her children.

"Peeta," Mrs. Mellark says as her husband moves her to the side.

"Don't," Peeta says, his voice low and threatening. He steps in front of me, then guides out of the closet to the main area of the bakery. We grab our coats as we walk out the door and wait to put them on until we're outside.

Snow is falling down, covering everything with its white flakes. I shiver from the cold and put on my coat and see Peeta doing the same.

"What do we do now?" I ask, breaking the silence. "Are we going home?"

"No," he says, giving me a smile, as he takes my hand and kisses or. "We are going to make a kid's birthday party the best this year. After all, he turns twelve today."

"Oh," is all I can say. The boy is of reaping age now. No parent wishes their child is picked for the Games. _We could end up training this kid in a few months._

"We aren't going to think about that, Katniss. We are going to make this day fun as possible for him and his family."

_It's like he just read my mind._ "How will we do that?"

"We are going to teach the kids how to make cookies and let them decorate them. I actually planned on doing this for a while now. Their parents will enjoy it, too."

_Peeta Mellark always saving the day._ I smile to myself. "What about the cookies we already made?"

"Well, originally I planned on the children decorating instead of baking, but now they can just do both." He smiles. "Come on," he says, leading us back to the bakery.

I feel sick. "We aren't going back in there, are we?" _I can't stand seeing that woman again._

"No, don't worry. I'll just sneak in the back and bring out a few supplies."

"Okay." I let out a sigh.

"I'll be quick." He gives me a kiss.

"I love you." _I've got a bad feeling about this._

"I love you, too," he calls out, then he's gone.


	10. The Six Months (5)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made up the Hawkins family, the oldest son's fiancé Lauren, and the little boy's friends. I'm not sure if I'll bring them in again. :)

Peeta walks out of the bakery, carrying a cardboard box with supplies in it. As I watch him walk toward me, I notice his pace is faster than usual. Something happened in the ten minutes I've been out here.

When he's in step with, I lock my arm through his. "Are you alright?"

"Yeah," he grunts. "I'm fine."

"No you're not," I say, tugging on his arm again, making him wince in pain on purpose. _I know I should leave it alone, but I swear . . . if that woman laid a hand on him . . ._

"I slipped and fell because of my stupid leg."

"Honestly?" I know Peeta is upset about his new leg. He didn't want the Games to change him and he sees it that way. I just hope he knows he hasn't changed in my eyes.

"Honestly."

I know he's hiding something, but I see the truth in his eyes. Deep down he knows I know. I just wish he'd admit it. I look at him pleadingly, wanting an answer.

Peeta sighs. "She tried to hit me after she went on about you and I again. I dogged the hit in time, but I slipped and fell. It's my arm that hurts. I'm fine, though. Just leave it alone."

"Peeta, she can't do that."

"No matter how hard my father tries there is no stopping her. Just leave it alone I said," Peeta snaps at me.

I'm slightly hurt. I frown and begin walking again, but I slow down and let him catch up to me, having no clue where we're going.

"Katniss," he pauses. I don't want to hear it from him.

"What?" I spit back, stopping in my tracks.

"I'm sorry." Peeta looks at me, his eyes hoping I accept.

"I know. I just can't stand the thought of you getting hurt by her. Or anyone or anything." That's all I can manage. I can't protect him from everything. I know that. It still pains me.

"I know, sweetheart. Come here." This is the first time he's using the nickname Haymitch calls me. It's annoying from him, but now I kind of like it coming from Peeta. I can't help but move closer to him. Peeta balances the brown box with his good arm and snakes his injured one around my waist, then kisses my forehead.

"When we get home, I want my mother to look at your arm. Promise me?"

"I promise," he says, kissing my head again, then we walk to our destination.

I slide my right arm around his waist under his coat. I can feel the heat radiating off his body, keeping my hand warm from the brisk, cold air. Snow is falling heavier now. Almost an inch has fallen. I wonder how long we're staying over with the kids.

When we reach the Hawkins' house, there are children playing in the snow. Inside the house, the parents greet Peeta and I warmly. I learn that the couple has three children: two sons and a daughter. Their oldest son is James, who's nineteen years old and who's going to be married soon to Lauren. The middle child is their daughter, Abbey, who's fifteen years of age, and then there's Alex, the birthday boy.

"I'm sorry we're late," Peeta says as Mrs. Hawkins helps him get the supplies out of the box.

Mrs. Hawkins smiles. "That's okay, dear. The boys are having a nice time outside, except for Alex," she sighs.

"What's wrong?" I ask.

"Mama," Abbey yells, rushing into the kitchen. "Alex won't get up from his seat. He's really sad and you know why . . . Nothing I tell him is helping. Even his friends can't get him up to play."

"Darling, can you go talk to him? You've talked to our children before at this age." Mrs. Hawkins says. She looks at her husband pleadingly.

"Darling," she calls out to her husband. "Can you talk to him again? You've talked to our children before at this age." Mrs. Hawkins looks at her husband pleadingly. "I knew this was a bad idea."

Mr. Hawkins is about to say something, but I interrupt him. "I'll go talk to him, if that's alright with you." I know it isn't my place to do this, but I feel like I might have a shot.

"You don't have to, Katniss," Mr. Hawkins says.

I know where he's going with this. "I'd like to try. The similar thing happened to Prim when she turned eleven." _Please, please let this work._

I walk into the small living area and see the blonde haired boy sitting in a chair, staring down at the floor. I get down on my knees, being eye level with him, and see a few tears on his face. "Hey, birthday boy. Happy birthday."

"Thank you," Alex mumbles, still not looking at me.

I know every child at the age of twelve isn't happy because they're eligible for the reaping, though in certain districts children might be happy about it. Sadness washes over me quickly, but I need to stay strong for the boy. I bite my lip, unsure of what to say. I glance back to the other room and see Peeta talking to the family members and showing them the supplies he brought.

"Peeta is going to teach you and your friends how to bake cookies later. So you want to see what he brought? I think you'll like it, and I know it'll be a lot of fun." I give the boy a smile.

"Why should I have fun?" Alex asks, looking up at me now. "I'm twelve now, and I could die in a couple of months."

I'm shocked at how bitter he is. I knew this wasn't going to be easy. I try my hardest not to frown and give myself away. "Did your older brother get picked?" I ask him suddenly.

Alex doesn't answer.

"Did your sister get picked?" I ask as I start to tickle his stomach. I don't know why I do. It was something I only did to Prim to cheer her up. _Maybe because his fear reminds me of Prim's._

Alex starts giggling uncontrollably. "Stop!" he begs with uncontrollable fits of laughter.

"I won't release you until you answer," I say laughing.

"No, they didn't!" he nearly shouts, panting and laughing.

"Maybe it's because your family is one of the lucky ones," I tell him, trying to give him hope and ease his mind. "Don't dread the future, but live for what you have now in front of you. Don't be like how I was." I pat his head and give him another smile.

Alex gets up from his seat and gives me a big hug, stunning me for a moment. "Thank you," he says, then I return the hug.

I look back over my shoulder and see his father standing quietly in the doorway, wondering if his son is alright. I smile at him and nod my head, then Mr. Hawkins walks away with a smile on his face.

"Alex," a voice hollers from another room.

"Go on now. Go see what's awaiting in the kitchen."

"Okay!" Alex smiles brightly as he runs off for the kitchen.

I slowly follow him into the room. His friends and family gather around, watching Peeta prepare the area for the cookies. I see him glance at me and smile. It's a weird smile, but it makes me feel warm inside.

"Now, where is the birthday boy?" Peeta asks, pretending to search high and low for Alex and making the children.

I see Mrs. Hawkins taking out the aprons, but they're all tangled together. I walk over to her and help untangle the aprons, then we pass them out to the seven children total and hike them up so that they don't trip over them.

The young teens watch Peeta, wide eyes like glue on him, as he gives them instructions. As Peeta throws flour around, the children mimic him, then Alex's friend starts a flour war, throwing flour everywhere. Laughter fills the room. It's not long before Peeta quiets them down again so that they can start making cookies. The children make the cookies in different shapes and sizes, each one special in their own way.

I see Peeta smile as he watches the cookies being gently placed on the pan. His blue eyes are full of happiness and joy. I know how much he loves to bake and watching him with the children tells me that he'll make a wonderful father one day.

As the cookies are cooking in the oven, everyone gathers in the larger room, watching Alex open his presents. I know his gifts aren't much to him, but the pure joy on his face says it all. I know he took what I said to heart.

There are seven minutes left on the timer when Alex finishes opening his gifts and thanking his parents and family. "Can we go outside and play in the snow, Dad?" Alex asks his father.

I look out the window and see that there's a lot of snow on the ground.

"Please! Just for a few minutes," he pleads, looking up at his father. His begging is joined by theother children.

"Oh, alright!" Mr. Hawkins says. "Everyone has to wear their coats though," he adds as the children rush to the front door to bundle up before they go outside.

"Team up with me?" James asks Peeta with a smile.

"Sure." Peeta smiles, then yells out to the kids as they disappear outside. I can't help but worry that Peeta is going to hurt himself worse but I try to let it go for now.

I decide to stay inside with Mrs. Hawkins and her future daughter-in-law. The counters and floor are covered with flour, and I decide to start washing the bowls and utensils.

"How are things with you and him?" Mrs. Hawkins asks.

"You?" I ask without thinking.

"You and Peeta, dear," she says with a laugh.

"Oh! Sorry," I say, biting my lip, as I look over my shoulder at her. "We're good."

"Are you two thinking about getting married anytime soon?" Lauren asks me.

My body warms all over at the thought, but then my stomach turns and I feel guilty. They must have thought that the romance in the Games was real. Is real. "I . . . possibly," I tell them, giving them a smile. I know my words might come back and bite me later.

"You two seem very happy," Lauren says as she starts to fold up the aprons. "I can't wait to get married."

"It's exciting," I say, hoping I sound thrilled about it. "When are you getting married?"

"In the spring," she sighs happily. "Then I can't wait to have children."

"That must be nice."

"Oh, Katniss, I'm sorry. I —"

"No, it's fine," I smile, trying to reassure Lauren. Babies grow up to be children. Children become old enough to be reaped . . .

I wonder if Peeta and I will have children or not now. I haven't thought about it since we've been together. Thinking of it now doesn't make me as uncomfortable as I was before with the idea and my head hasn't screamed no like before. Some families are lucky where their children aren't reaped at all, but if Peeta and I had children, they'd be even desirable, being born of two Victors, and be reaped and suffer what we went through.

The timer ringing pulls me out of my thoughts, and I have no idea what Mrs. Hawkins and Lauren are talking about now but I excuse myself to bring in the kids.

Mr. Hawkins opens the door. "Is it time yet? It's getting colder by the minute."

"They just got done," I assure him. "I can go out there and get them."

"Okay," he says, giving me a warm smile.

I can't help but feel something is about to happen as I open the door and close it. I watch Peeta and James play with the children. Snow is flying everywhere while laughter fills the cold, brisk air and empty streets.

"Now!" someone yells.

Cold snow hits me in the face and I regret leaving my cost open instead of zipping of up. The children laugh at me as I yelp at the cold attacking my body.

"Peeta!" I yell out and all I hear is laughter.

He runs towards me. I quickly form a snowball and throw it at his face, but it hits his neck instead. Peeta laughs, then he tackles me. His hands find my neck, making me shriek at the icy feeling of his fingers, then his cold lips find mine, kissing me quickly.

"The cookies are ready," I manage to say.

"Okay," he says as he lets me go. "The cookies are ready. Let's head inside and decorate them," Peeta shouts tells the kids. He gives me another quick kiss, then we all go inside.

I help collect the coats and boots and set them near the warm fire to dry them as Peeta leads the children back into the kitchen, icing their cookies. Mrs. Hawkins serves sandwiches. It's not long before half of the cookies disappear.

It's early evening when James and Mr. Hawkins take the children home to their families. Peeta and I politely wait until they're back home again before we leave, helping Lauren and Mrs. Hawkins clean up the rest of the mess. When they arrive back home, Mr. and Mrs. Hawkins thank us for giving the kids a wonderful time. We talk to them a while longer, then we head home.

As we pass by the bakery, my body stiffens.

"Katniss, I need to head back over to the bakery before it gets any later. Go on home before it gets too late. I promise I will come to you in less than hour."

"But your arm . . ." I know this isn't an argument I can win, but it's worth a shot. I don't want it any worse.

"Nothing is going to happen to me. Don't worry. I just need to check on my dad. My mom is probably up in the house now. Usually she cooks dinner right about now," he assures me.

"Okay," I say. I give him a long kiss and head home.

I suddenly regret letting Peeta out of my sight, for I fear something is about to happen to him.


	11. The Sixth Months (6)

The sky is now black and the snow is falling heavier than it's been all day. Maybe four or five inches have fallen already. As I start to walk home, I look back, watching Peeta enter the bakery. Many things could go wrong. It worries me. It's bad enough that he injured his arm by dodging his mother. This time though, Peeta could be cornered, leaving him to take the hit, and he could be harmed even worse. He could injure his other arm or trip and fall, causing him to injure his leg. 

God, I can't stand it. I shake the thought away, clearing my head. I'm nearly halfway home when I stumble on my boot laces. I sigh heavily as I kneel to retie them. 

Once I finish, I suddenly feel that something isn't right. I look around in front of me as I stand, the snow remaining untouched. I turn around, taking in the view of the nearby buildings. Most of the lights are off as everyone is either eating dinner or getting ready for bed. There's no one outside even though I still have a feeling that someone is close by.

I start to walk again, trying to ignore the feeling, thinking I still haven't gotten over the Games. _I know I haven't gotten over the Games._ A few steps later, I hear light footsteps besides my own. Stopping, I listen closely. The footsteps aren't coming closer, but moving further away. I turn around again, watching the left side carefully. I start to walk back slowly and notice a dark figure sneaking by the buildings. It's odd. I keep myself hidden as I stand by a short building, watching the figure.

The figure is tall. Maybe a little taller than Peeta. It's footsteps are big, too. I think the person might be a male. As I keep watch of him, I notice he dodges every bit of light that shines. _Why would a local dodge the light?_

I make my way toward the male, walking slowly and keeping my distance incase danger arises. I gain more ground on him when he turns and walks in between two buildings, still hiding from the light. If I had a weapon on me, I would follow him and question him. Nothing about this person seems right at all.

I wait a moment before I carefully cross, making myself remain unseen. It's then that I know that the person is heading toward the Mellark's bakery. Nothing about this make any sense. Everyone knows that the Mellark's bakery closes this time at night.

I see the man last-minute, sneaking passed another building again when I hear yelling. It's Peeta's mother. "Why were you trying to steal from us when you're so full of money?"

"I wasn't. Just ask —" Peeta says in defense. I break into a run to the bakery, forgetting about the man who probably just found out that I was following him. I know it was a wrong move, but Peeta needs me. Finding out more about this person is important, but it can wait as much as I don't want it to. Peeta is more important and I need to go to him.

When I open the bakery door, I witness Mrs. Mellark slap Peeta in the face. "Peeta," I cry out, causing Mrs. Mellark and Peeta to look at me.

"And you," she spits out. "What the hell are you doing back here? You're not welcome here."

"Katniss is allowed here whether you like it or not, Mother," Peeta says, freeing his wrist from his mother's hold.

"I won't allow it." Mrs. Mellark tries to grab Peeta's wrist again, but he takes a step back, standing closer to me.

Mrs. Mellark steps closer to Peeta and I, and I feel Peeta take my hand. "You need to leave," she says, her voice full of anger. 

As I begin to protest, Mr. Mellark enters the front of the bakery and interrupts. "Abigail, that's enough." Mr. Mellark manages to pull his wife away from us. "I will not have you yelling at our son and Katniss any longer."

"I can't believe you," she says in disbelief.

"That's enough," he tells her before looking back at Peeta and I. "Peeta, you should go on home and take a few days off. Your brothers can help me for the rest of the week."

"Alright. Let's go, Katniss," Peeta says, grabbing my hand and leading me out the door.

When we are outside, I let out a breath I didn't know I was holding. Peeta gives my hand a squeeze and kisses it. It makes me smile. When we pass by a few buildings, I feel like someone is watching us. The person could be anywhere. I don't hear anything unusual and everything looks the same as it's been. There aren't even footprints showing that someone's been around except our own. The snow isn't any help at all either. I realize we've stopped walking.

"Hey," Peeta says, letting go of my hand and snaking his arm around my waist. "What's wrong?"

"I . . . I don't know," I sigh. It's obviously a lie and I'm sure Peeta can tell. I know I should tell him what I saw, but the moment isn't right and the man could be listening.

"Is it my parents?"

"What? No. It's just . . . I'll tell you when we reach home, okay?" I look up into his eyes and he smiles. 

"Okay," he says, kissing my temple before we start walking again.

"I'm sorry," I say after a short while.

Peeta lets out a light laugh. "Don't be. If it weren't for you showing up, that wouldn't have gone as nicely as that went."

"It isn't right. She can't do that to you."

"I know, but I can't do anything about it."

"How bad was it?"

Peeta sighs and gives my waist a gentle squeeze. "Don't worry about it." A few moments pass before he speaks again. "She caught me as I was leaving. She only slapped me twice."

"I can't stand you getting hurt," I say after a moment, resting my head on his shoulder.

"I know." He kisses the top of my head. "I'll be all right."

As we arrive at Victor's Village, I see the lights on at my house, meaning my mother and Prim are still up, likely waiting for me. I never told them when I'd be home. "Let my mother look at your arm tonight," I say, my voice almost begging.

"I'm pretty sure it's fine. If it bothers me tomorrow, I'll have her give it a look."

"Okay." We've stopped where the road divides between the three houses.

"Katniss, you should go on home tonight.

"Peeta . . ." I plead, looking into his eyes.

"I'll be okay." Peeta takes me into his arms and I wrap my own around his neck. "I just need to be alone for a while. I'll come and get you in the morning."

"All right." I know Peeta shouldn't be alone but it's what he wants. "I'll see you tomorrow."

"Tomorrow," he repeats, voice quiet. His lips then meet mine and we are kissing slowly. When we part, we are both breathless. "I love you."

"I love you, too," I say before I kiss him again. When we part this time, I take hold of his hand and we hold on as long as we can, watching each other as we both enter our own home.


	12. The Six Months (7)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm not a nurse, though I'm on my way to becoming one. I've suffered broken bones and sprained wrists, so I know somewhat how doctors and nurses check for broken bones and such. Obviously Mrs. Everdeen doesn't have an X-Ray machine or have nice technology like the Capitol and District 13 have to know if there's a break or not. Please take this with a grain of salt. If you happen to injure yourself after this chapter, please see a medical doctor to know for sure. This is purely fiction.

Horrors of the arena torment my dreams, allowing me to get little sleep from tossing and turning. As morning arrives, I decide to finally sit up in bed and gather my thoughts, telling myself that Peeta and I will never have to go back in the arena, although we will have to go back to the Capitol to train new tributes in the summer. 

I sigh heavily as it brings me no comfort, and unwanted thoughts come to mind about the Victory Tour which is only a few weeks away. I get out of bed and walk to my dresser when I hear the front door opening. It's too early for Prim to be awake, so I know that it's my mother opening up the door but why?

I start to panic. My mind goes back to the other evening when I was going over to the bakery and noticed someone following Peeta. _Could it be that very same person? But why? It's too early in the morning._

As I put on dark denim jeans, I hear the faint sounds of glasses clanking against each other and table chairs sliding on the floor and being moved out of the way. Knowing that someone possibly unknown to me is inside my home alone with my mother downstairs, I hurriedly put on my bra and a deep burgundy long-sleeved shirt. I make note to finish up my daily routine later so that I can get to the bottom of this mystery. Socks are long forgotten as I slip into my boots.

I start to walk down the stairs silently as possible while listening to my mother and the other person. 

"Have a seat," I hear my mother say.

"Thank you," the other responds.

I pause before I take the next step, my right hand on the railing and my left on the wall, as I immediately recognize the voice of Peeta. Relief washes over me, and a smile forms on my lips as my mind floods of _him_ and of _us_ , making me blush. Before I know it my foot hits the next step with a loud _clank_ coming from my boot. I know I'm heard, but my mother and Peeta don't say anything to me or mention it to each other.

Chairs are scoot back and forth at the table. "What can I do for you today?"

"I was wondering if you could take a look at my wrist. I hurt it last night, and I know that Katniss would make me come for a visit since it's feeling a bit worse," Peeta says. His blue eyes are on me as I enter the kitchen and lean against a counter close by.

"How did it happen?" my mother asks. She gives me a quick glance, then turns her attention back to Peeta.

"I slipped." Peeta's using the same lie he told me yesterday afternoon. My mother seems to accept the answer, but Peeta and I both know what the true cause is. It's not something I would say to my mother. She's had patients and she knows the signs, but it isn't my place.

She pulls up Peeta's sleeve past his elbow and begins to examine his right forearm and wrist. "Does that hurt?" she asks while she applies pressure on his bones.

"No," he answers her honestly.

"I need you to relax some," she tells him as she has his elbow resting on the table with her hand slightly holding his. "Squeeze your hand for me." Peeta attempts the action and I can tell he's in some pain. "Does that hurt at all?" she asks. He shakes his head no which makes me frown. I know that he's trying to be strong. "Okay, and how about this?" She bends his wrist back and forth carefully and slowly.

"No." He grimaces slightly, but it doesn't go unnoticed by us. "Not at all."

"Peeta." I know that he knows what I'm thinking.

"I'm fine Katniss," he assures me.

"It's only a sprain," my mother interrupts. I sigh in relief that it's not broken and that it won't lead to that. "You have a little swelling, but you're able to move your wrist and fingers without much difficultly. Let me get a bandage wrap, then you'll be good to go."

"That's really not necessary," Peeta says, almost pleading.

"It's only for caution," she assures him. "I don't like my patients making their injuries worse, especially if it is preventable." My mother gets up from her chair and leaves to get a medical wrap.

"You don't have to lie about it here," I say, breaking the silence between us.

"It doesn't matter," he says quietly.

"My mother has dealt with worse —"

"Katniss, just drop it, alright? Today is a new day and I would rather forget yesterday's troubles."

I stay quiet for a moment before I answer. "If that's what you want."

"It is."

"Fine," I say, crossing my arms over my chest. I'm no longer looking at him. 

"Fine," he says quietly as my mother enters the room again. I look at him and I see him smiling at me, and I can't help but smile back at him.

My mother sits back down in her seat and begins to apply the bandage wrap around his wrist and lower arm. It goes between his thumb and other fingers and back around his wrist before she smooths out the bandage and cuts the extra wrap off. She makes sure it's nice and snug and sturdy so that he can't move it around as much as I know he would like. "It's a reusable wrap. You can take it off for showers and whatever reason you see fit, but I strongly recommend that you sleep in it to prevent further injury. Keep it wrapped for about a week and a half. Two at the most. If you're still having pain or if it worsens come back." My mother pauses for a moment. "Well, you might not need me since you'll be at the Capitol, but I'm sure you know what I mean." She smiles at us. "Is there anything else you need?"

"That's was it." He returns the smile. "Thank you, Mrs. Everdeen."

"Thanks, Mom," I say.

They get up from their places and we start heading for the door. I then feel Peeta's hand holding mine. My face blushes again.

"Where are you two off to today?" my mother asks us. "It's still too cold to be outside." I suddenly remember that I need to finish getting ready for the day.

"Actually," Peeta starts, then looks at me before looking back at my mother. I feel my face start to flame. "I was wondering if I could have dinner alone with your daughter, if that's alright with you," Peeta says.

My face heats further at his words. I am completely surprised, my body unmoving. I can only imagine what is going through my mother's head now. She may like Peeta as a friend for her daughter, but now we've become more so quickly and she might not like it. I'm unsure of her actually knowing yet. Even if Prim is around our mother all day, I don't think she would mention anything about me and Peeta.

My mother looks at him, then to me and back to him again. A slight smile forms on her lips. "I don't see why not. Just don't keep her out too late."

"Of course." Peeta smiles. "Thank you again."

"You're welcome, Peeta. Prim and I will be back later this evening, but Katniss, you know where to find me."

"Yes," I say. They're going into town tending to those who are too ill to come here for a visit. Winter hasn't arrived yet, but it's made itself known. 

"I'll see you later, dear," my mother tells me. She kisses my cheek, then walks back into the kitchen, leaving Peeta and I alone in the doorway.

"So . . ."

"So . . ." he repeats, his thumb rubbing my knuckles. "I was planning on going back over to the bakery to check on things this morning, but then I'm free."

"Okay." I frown and decide not to say anything about him going over to his family's bakery.

"Katniss —" 

I shake my head. "I understand. I was thinking about getting some game for the town anyways."

"Then I'll catch up with you later?" he asks. Peeta seems happy that I'll be busy. The meadow is a nice distraction.

"Okay," I reply. I feel him pulling me closer to him as his hand cups my cheek. I blush as I look up at him, meeting his blue eyes. His lips touch mine and I'm in pure bliss. My hands find themselves in his hair and his hand moves from my cheek to my waist. Peeta is the one to break kiss, but he doesn't pull away from me.

"I gotta go," he says.

"I'll see you later." I give him a kiss before releases me. When he does, I feel colder than I did before, wanting his warmth back near me, and wrap my arms around my chest. "I love you," I tell him as he opens the door.

"I love you too," he says and then he's gone.


	13. The Six Months (8)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A few hours have gone by since the morning happened and Katniss has been in the woods for a long while now with hardly any luck with game.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I named one Peeta's brothers Rye. When I first started this story I had names in mind for his brothers and for possible future children, so I'm sticking with my original plan. I've been told by a friend that Rye is the son of Katniss and Peeta. All I find on the Internet is hopefuls wanting it to be true while others have other ideas for baby names. I'll be sticking with my own. I hope this doesn't upset anyone.

I have an arrow aiming at a rabbit when I hear a fallen tree branch break not too far behind me. I instantly turn around, keeping my bow and arrow ready to shoot, and look around for the thing that caused the noise. Panic begins to rise in me, but I try not to let it get the best of me. I'm all by myself in the woods, knowing that no one besides Gale and I really come out here, and I know that it isn't Gale because he's always quiet when he approaches and at this time he is working. I don't understand. I don't know who it could be. 

I scan the snow covered ground for footprints besides my own and only see mine. I take a few steps and have another look at my surroundings, looking for anything that looks different, but everything seems to be the same.

I begin to walk again in the direction I heard the sound, forgetting about getting game, then I hear other footsteps than my own. I stop and look around in front of me, hearing a branch snap and a mumble of curses. I start to run. 

"Stay where you are!" I yell not too loudly with my bow still ready to shoot. "Who are you?"

"Katniss?" 

_Peeta._ I start to run faster with my bow at my side. I have to hurry and get to Peeta. I don't know if it was him who broke the branch or if there is someone else out here.

When I reach him, I see that he just got up off the ground, brushing snow off his pants and coat, and I catch him flexing his fingers a little. "Are you alright?" I ask.

"Yeah," he says. It doesn't sound that assuring. "Must have stepped on a piece of ice or something." A slight frown appears on his face and he brushes off his left pant leg some more, and that's all I need to know. That, and that there's not tree branch around.

I find it hard not asking about his leg. It's been several months since then, but I know he still doesn't like it and I know that now isn't the time to bring it up after his fall. "What are you doing out here?" I ask, wanting to change the topic, and put away my bow and arrow.

"I couldn't find you in town and your mother and Prim said that they hadn't seen you since this morning, so I decided to come out here and try to find you." Peeta smiles at me.

"Well, you found me." I wrap my arms around his waist and look into his blue eyes. Peeta's hands rest on my hips, holding me close, then his lips are on mine, kissing me softly. A hand remains on my hip while his other hand rests on the back of my neck. His hand is warm on the nape of my neck, sending chills down my body and making me shiver, and I hold onto him tighter. A second later I hear footsteps and a noise that I can't quite make out, causing me to jump.

Peeta breaks the kiss, looking worried. "Everything okay?"

"I . . . Yeah." He lets go of me, and I wrap my arms around myself. "I'm just cold. I've been out here a long time."

"Then let's get you warmed up." Peeta smirks at me, blue eyes sparkling, which makes me blush regardless of how on guard I feel. He takes my hand in his as we begin to walk back up to the fences.

He didn't hear me yell or anything, which is okay and not okay. I know that if he knew someone else was out here, then he would try to protect me first even though he doesn't have a weapon on him and I'm the one with the bow. It's hard trying to piece the puzzle together, but one thing is for sure: someone is after me or Peeta, or the both of us together.

". . . Katniss."

I feel my hand being tugged back. "What?" I realize that Peeta has stopped walking. "Oh, sorry." I turn to face him with my hand still in his. He's standing next to the fallen tree that I store my bow and quiver of arrows in.

"Are you sure you're okay?" he asks me as I let go of his hand for a moment to store away my belongings. 

When they are both stored away, I take Peeta's hand and give it a squeeze when we start to walk again. "I think my ear is acting up," I lie. "The one the Capitol fixed. I keep hearing noises that I normally don't hear. I don't know if it's whatever they did to it or if I'm just going crazy."

"You're not going crazy," he assures me. I feel him kiss the side of my head. "You know . . ." he pauses.

"What?"

"You're not going to like it . . ."

"Tell me," I urge him.

He lets out a breath. "When we go to the Capitol in a few weeks, you could have the doctors take a look at it."

"Peeta."

"I'm just suggesting it. If it's bothering you that much then —"

"I'll think about it," I interrupt, not letting him finish. I know what he's going to say and I don't want to hear it, though I know he's looking out for me. "Thank you, though." I feel him give my hand a squeeze.

As we walk closer to the fences, I notice that the footsteps I left look like someone stepped in my tracks. I know Peeta must have followed mine but the footprints look messer than what they'd look like if only one person made them. I see the fallen tree branch laying in the snow broken in half to the left of me. Someone else was definitely out here and it makes my body go cold, but I can't act or say anything at the moment. They could be following us and we could be in trouble. 

We're able to climb up the tree and get over the fence with no problem and with no one catching us, if that person who was following me is gone. It's hard telling and it bothers me. "Home?" Peeta asks me.

"No, you're place. I wasn't able to get anything."

"Okay," he says, wrapping his arm around my waist.

Minutes later we reach Peeta's house. He unlocks his door, then we enter inside. Immediately I can feel my body start to warm from the heat coming from the fire. I can smell the remains of something cooked and it smells delicious. Peeta helps me out of my coat, then leads me to the fireplace and picks up a blanket off the floor. "Can't let you get a cold," he says as he drapes the blanket around me.

I can't help but smile. "Thanks," I say, wrapping the warm blanket from the fire tighter around my body, and look around at the floor. There are other blankets and pillows spread out and a basket laying in the middle, making me curious.

Peeta wraps his arms around my waist and kisses me. "Can I trust you to stay here while I finish getting our dinner ready and trust you not open up that basket?"

"Yes." I smile and kiss him again. 

"Good." He smiles at me, then let's me go. "I'll let you know when you can come in," he says as he walks into the dining room and kitchen area. 

I decide to sit near the fire and pull the blanket around me tighter. The heat is warm, but I still shiver. I hope that I'm not getting a cold. I stare into the flames and it reminds me of the flames of our chariot outfits, reminding me that in two weeks Peeta and I will be back in the Capitol for our tour. A tour I would very much like to skip, but it's required. I let out a sigh and pull the blanket tighter against me and bring my knees up to my chest.

"Katniss," Peeta calls. I turn my head and see that he's leaning on the wall in the entryway to the dining room.

I start to get up, but Peeta walks over to me quickly and helps me. I'm not sure if it's because he's being a gentleman or if I look like I might need the help. When I take a step my foot steps on the blanket, causing me to almost fall, but Peeta takes my hand, steadying me. "Thanks," I say, feeling myself blush, and Peeta smiles.

"Dinner is ready," he says as I let go of the blanket, letting it fall to floor.

"I'm starved," I say, smiling when we head into the dining room. I'm at a loss of words at the beauty. There are six tall green candles lit and spread around the table. Two bowls and plates and silverware are set directly across from each other accompanied by wine glasses though there's only a bottle of juice. There's a plate full of cheese buns and a medium sized pot with stew inside and there's small pots with various vegetables inside. It all looks so perfect. "It smells delicious," I tell him shyly. 

"Thanks." Peeta smiles and pulls out a chair for me. I take a seat and begin to feel nervous when Peeta walks to the other side and sits across from me.

We sit there in silence for a moment, and I think now we are both nervous. Peeta is looking at me and I'm looking at him. Occasionally I glance at the food, but I don't want to be rude and take the initiative. I decide to take a sip of my dark purple colored juice.

Peeta takes a cheese bun, and I see him looking at the soup then back at me smiling, his blue eyes shinning. "The soup is one of your favorites," he says, picking up his glass and taking a sip. 

I take that as my cue and take a few spoonfuls from the soup. I notice that it's lamb stew with dried plums, and I can't help but smile at him for remembering one of my favorite meals. I take a few spoonfuls from the vegetables and Peeta does the same. 

"This is really nice, Peeta," I say after taking a few bites of the food. 

"Thanks," he says. "It's something I've been wanting to do for a while." He smiles, but I try not to frown, knowing it's probably been several months of him wanting to do this for me.

"How was the bakery today?" I ask, stirring the food in my bowl.

"It was alright. My mother wasn't around, so I was able to help make some deliveries for my dad since he's kind of behind on some orders. But Rye is there helping him when he isn't lazing away with his girlfriend."

"Oh, well, if you need help over there, I could help. Or I could see if Prim wants to help. That is if you need it and want it. I know last time I was there . . . things didn't go so well, but —"

"Thanks, Katniss. I appreciate it. I know my dad would, too, but I should probably check it out first before you arrive. I mean . . . I just don't want another repeat . . ." His ears start to turn a little red, and my face begins to warm at the memory, forgetting all that happened with his mother.

"Okay," I say before I take another bite.

A while later, we finish up our food mostly in silence due to our nervousness, which is crazy. We've been alone before, but we've done other activities or we were interrupted. I help Peeta move our dishes into the kitchen and offer to help wash, but he turns it down and says that he'll clean up later tonight. At that we make our way into the living room, glasses in hand, where the blankets lay in front of the roaring fire. Setting my glass down an arms length away so that I don't spill it later, I take the blanket I had a while ago and wrap it around myself again and look at the basket that I promised not to open.

I feel Peeta's arm wrap around me. "You can open it now," he says, knowing that the wait is killing me and knowing how I don't really like surprises all that much.

I lean forward and bring the basket closer, which gives off the scent of more food. I lift up the lid and see that there are more cheese buns and other breads and desserts as well. There's raisin bread, cookies of all sorts, and some various kinds of muffins. The wonderful works of baking makes me happy. "Thank you, Peeta," I say before I turn to kiss him.

"Whatever we don't eat, I figured you might want to take home so I wiped up some extras and found this basket," he says, then he kisses me again softly.

When we break apart, I reach for a cookie that has a shade of light orange icing on it. I break the cookie in half and give part of it to Peeta as I begin to eat the other half. It tastes of vanilla with a hint of lemon in it, which makes me want to eat another cookie. Peeta's cookies are almost as addicting as his wonderful cheese buns. After I finish the cookie I grab another one and Peeta picks out a blueberry muffin.

"So . . ." he starts.

"So . . ." I repeat.

He lets out a breath. "I know that we have been avoiding a certain topic, and believe me, I don't want to talk about it either, but we have to at some point. And I'd rather have us talk about it now or soon than have it be the eve before the Tour."

"Peeta . . ." I sigh, unable to form any words. I pick a piece off his muffin and chew it. I don't really know what to say about the Tour, and I don't know what he wants to hear from me. "What are we going to do?" I ask quietly.

"I don't know," he says, setting aside his muffin, and wraps his arm around my waist, pulling me closer to him. I know he doesn't know what to say either. "I guess we will just take it one day at a time. We don't have to act like we're in love anymore because we are, so I'm not worried about it."

I snuggle closer in his arms. "What about President Snow? The other districts? We —"

"We'll say what he wants to hear, and the districts . . ." he pauses, thinking for a moment. "It'll be okay," he repeats. "We'll just take it one day at a time. I'm just glad I don't have to face it alone."

"Me too," I say, wrapping my arms around him. I tilt my head back and look into his eyes and kiss him softly. When I break the kiss, he pulls me closer into a hug, holding me and comforting me as much as I'm comforting him, resting his head on mine. "Peeta," I say after a while.

"Yeah?"

"I . . ." I feel Peeta lift his head off mine, and I turn to look at him. His blue eyes are dark, and I feel so warm by him and from the fire and by love. And I can't help but kiss him, hoping the kiss expresses everything I want to say.

I kiss him slowly, wanting to take my time, and run my fingers through his blonde hair. I feel the blanket fall away from my shoulders as Peeta's hands come to rest on my hips. I still can't get over the feeling of how good it feels to kiss Peeta. Every kiss swirls warmth in my belly, making me feel warmer than ever. I decide to get in his lap, each of my knees next to his hips, without breaking the kiss. Peeta is the one deepens the kiss, his tongue asking for entrance, and I let him. He brings me closer to him, our bodies pressing against each other up as close as they can be.

When I break the kiss, I rest my forehead against his. "I love you," I tell him, looking into his eyes.

"I love you too," he replies. His hand comes up to the side of my face, cupping my cheek, and he kisses me this time. It's slow at first, but then it picks up a bit. I feel his other hand still resting on my hip and I can feel him hardening in between my legs, causing a wave of desire and warmth wash over me. My tongue finds its way into his mouth and I can tell it surprises him by the grip of his hand on my hip. Taking it as a good sign I continue on with the kiss, my tongue meeting his and my fingers tangling in his hair. I feel his hand go underneath my shirt and feel his warm hand on my skin, leaving a heated trail up my waist and side. My hands find the hem of his red shirt and as I begin to tug it up some, Peeta break breaks the kiss, allowing us to get some air with our foreheads are pressed together again, looking into each other's eyes.

"I'm sorry," he says, panting almost, and I'm completely lost. I don't understand why he is apologizing to me. He hasn't done anything wrong.

"Don't be," I start, letting go of his shirt, but Peeta shakes his head and let's go of me. I decide to get off him and sit in front of him and fix my shirt.

"I don't want you to feel like you have to go through with what we're doing. I don't want you to feel forced into this." He takes a breath and runs a hand through his hair. "I mean we just got together and I don't want us to move too fast unless you want to. I know that lately I've kind of been all over you and I know you seem to be enjoying it as much as I am but-"

"Peeta," I interrupt. My face begins to warm at what I'm about to say. "I want to. I enjoy it. I don't want to stop. It scares me a little," I pause to think about how I want to explain, "because it's all new to me, but I don't want to stop. I love you."

"I love you too," he says, sounding a bit relieved.

"Time . . . time is too short to wait anymore," I say, and I guess I said the right thing because then his lips crash against mine heatedly.

His hands roam up my body, gripping my breasts and making me gasp and moan. I reach for the hem of his shirt again and tug upwards, and Peeta cooperates this time, helping me take off his shirt while trying not to break the kiss as much as possible. He reaches behind me and breaks the kiss to move the basket out of the way, then lays me down onto the blankets. Peeta is hovering slightly above me and kissing me, our legs brushing against each other, but it's not enough contact for me. I want to feel his full weight on me and his warmth even though the fire is still going, so I wrap my arms around him and tug him downward.

His lips go down to my neck and kisses me there. "What do you want?" he whispers in my ear darkly.

"You," I pant back and moan when I feel him pressed up against me. My fingers tangle in his hair and I kiss him hungrily. Peeta's hands roam back up underneath my shirt. Everywhere he touches feels like it's burning, and I feel too warm and want to get out of my shirt. "Off," I say through the kiss, attempting to tug up my own shirt in the little space between us with one hand.

He rests up on his forearms, and I quickly shrug out of my long sleeve shirt. When it's out of the way, Peeta kisses me again, tongue and all, and my arms wrap around him, holding him close. His hands skin up to my bra, and I can feel his fingers sliding underneath my bra and touching my skin there, making me moan and buck my hips into his, which makes me moan again when I feel him there. "Can I . . ?" he trails off, and I know what he's asking.

"Yes." I shake my head. His hands go up to the straps and gently brings them down as his lips kiss and suck on my neck. I lift up slightly so that he can undo the hooks and lay back down, discarding my bra.

"Tell me when to stop or what isn't okay." His voice is husky and almost demanding.

"I promise," I say, using the same words I used the other night when he asked me the similar thing, trusting him.

He kisses my lips, then trails kisses down my neck and to my chest. I feel his hands grip both my breasts and feel his lips on one of them. My fingers go back to his hair, and my body arches up into the sensation. The feeling sends heat straight down to my core and makes my hips slowly start to grind against his.

"Peeta," I moan when I feel his lips move to my other breast and all I can do is hold his head down closer so that he doesn't move because of how good it all feels. And my hips start to grind faster at the heat and the friction against his, and I can feel him responding to me and hear his own moans against skin. I let out another moan, and Peeta's hand leaves my breast to stop my hips from moving, making me whimper at the loss of contact against his hips and his hand on my breast. "What-"

"You're making me get close," he says panting, his ears bright red.

"Oh," I say, blushing and understanding what he means. "Can we . . . Do you want to get out of . . ." I rush out and stop, not able to finish my sentence due to embarrassment. My face burns even more.

"If that's what you want," he says, leaving me to give the final answer, and looks as if he'll be okay with whichever answer.

"It is," I say and kiss him. "But I don't . . . want to . . ." I feel my face turn ever redder.

"We don't have to go that far tonight," he reassures me, and it makes me smile knowing that he knows what I'm meaning even in this situation. It leaves me wondering if we'll always be like that forever, knowing exactly what the other is thinking most of time.

"Okay," I say before our lips meet again.

As his hands still rest on my hips, I decide to trail my hands over his body, which is toned and muscular and perfect. My hands find their way to his waist, and I start to undo the button and zipper of his jeans, then help him out of them. It isn't long before he follows my actions and undos my own jeans and gets me out of them.

The instant we are pressed together, skin on skin, sends heat everywhere throughout my body. It's like as if we fit together like puzzle pieces being made for each other. It's a brand new discovery for the both of us, seeing each other like this. Peeta's fingers tuck my hair behind my ear and cups my cheek in his hand. My hands rest on his upper arms as he rests on his elbows.

"Did you think this would happen tonight?" I ask quietly, looking into his eyes.

"No," he says honestly. "We can stop now if you want," he offers.

"No," I say a little too loudly and quickly. "I mean, no. I want to continue, if you do."

"I do," he reassures me.

"Then kiss me," I say and he does, slowly at first and quickly becomes rushed and heated and all tongue and moans and gasps when I feel his hips slowly start to grind against mine again.

"Fuck, Katniss," he moans into my ear, and I want to hear him say my name like that again. "I can feel how wet you are," he says and heat courses through me at his words, making me moan. And I can feel him there, again, touching the right spot that makes me moan and claw at his back, wanting him to keep moving and he does.

"There," I moan when he grinds up against me perfectly again, and it's almost too difficult to not get out of my remaining clothes and actually feel him there instead of being covered. "Please," I beg, wrapping my legs around his waist, wanting that sensation over and over again.

"God, yes," Peeta moans and bites my lip, then finds my neck and begins to suck on me there on that point, making me arch up and moan and dig my nails into his back, which makes him moan out my name and drives me crazy. He starts to grind and thrust harder against me and it makes me feel closer to breaking.

I hold onto him tighter and being his head down to kiss me again. "I think I'm about to - Peeta," I cry out, my orgasm hitting me hard. "Oh, yes," I moan, kissing him again as he continues to grind against me.

"Katniss," he moans and pants when he's finished. I can feel him still against me and it makes me squirm. He rests his head on my chest and run my fingers through his damp hair, then I notice that we're both sweating but it doesn't matter. "I love you," he says, planting a kiss below my breast.

"I love you too," I tell him, kissing his head. We both lay there for a while, trying to regain our normal breathing. I feel his hand twine his fingers with mine.

"Ready for another round?" he asks, and I can feel him smirking into my skin and start to harden down below. My body begins to warm again and I can't help but want to go another round as well.

"Sure," I say, smiling and laughing a little. "Just give me a couple more minutes."

"Okay," he says, and shifts upward to give me another kiss on my lips before he sits up.


	14. The Six Months (9)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So Haymitch says some things. I know it might be weird, but I wanted him to give them a certain warning, and I wanted to explore and give more reasons to his drunk stupor that he's in during the beginning of Catching Fire, right before they all leave for the Victory Tour.

It's early morning when I wake, feeling cold and shivering. I tilt my head down, looking at my blanket covered feet, and see that there's only burning embers in the fireplace. I'm too comfortable to get up to start another fire, and I look over my shoulder and see Peeta sleeping peacefully. I decide not to wake him and carefully turn onto my side, facing Peeta, and shift closer to him, wanting him to keep me warm while trying not to wake him. When I settle down comfortably and close my eyes, Peeta stirs, then I feel his hand resting on my bare hip. 

My face burns, my body tingling all over at the contact and at the memories of last night swarming my mind. I feel warm all over. A wave of pleasure washes over me, and I suddenly want to repeat or at least do something that we did last night. The idea of it warms me even more. 

I feel his hand caress my hip to my lower back, then I feel him tugging me closer to him. My body moves on its own accord, making our bodies press up against each other, skin on skin. I open my eyes to see his eyes dark and bluer than they've ever been, and it takes my breath away, knowing the look he's giving me. 

"Kiss me," I whisper as I'm overwhelmed with emotion. 

Peeta's hand leaves my waist and moves to my neck as his lips touch mine. The kiss is hot and hungry, making me want more. I wrap my arms around his neck and shoulders, and tug him more on top of me as I shift onto my back. 

Warmth courses through my body as our bodies are pressed back together. My fingers tangle in his hair as he deepens the kiss with his tongue, making me moan and arch up into his body, my breast pressing up against his chest. 

"Katniss," he pants as he breaks the kiss and nuzzles the side of my neck and shoulder. 

"Please," I moan when I feel how hard he is against me. I thrust my hips up against his. 

He moans loudly and grips my hip, then his fingers trails over my inner thigh. We both only have one article of clothing separating us and keeping us from being completely naked, and I almost want to do something about it as I'm driven and wanting him. But I decide against it, knowing that we're both not ready for that, though the thought drives me crazy. 

I tilt his head back up by his hair and kiss him. He deepens the kiss as he props himself up on one arm while keeping most of his weight on me. I try to arch my body, wanting more contact, but then I feel his hand on my lower abdomen and his fingers sliding under the band of my underwear. 

The anticipation makes me squirm, thrusting my hips, and it's enough to feel his cock, warm and hard, making him moan. He sucks and bites at my upper lip, then his tongue skims the roof of my mouth before he breaks the kiss. 

Peeta's hand trails lower, and I soon feel his fingers touching the bundle of nerves at my center. 

"Peeta," I moan loudly in a voice that doesn't sound like my own. Heat courses through my body, and I desperately want more. 

"You're so wet for me, Katniss," he groans as he rubs my center. His teeth scrap across my neck, sending more tingling sensations through my body.

"Yes," I pant, my toes curling and scrapping across the back of his thigh, writhing beneath him. My hand reaches the back of his neck, and I tug him back toward me, kissing his lips hungrily. I suddenly want to feel more of him. 

My other hand slides between our bodies and under the waste band of his boxers. I feel him warm and hard and wrap my hand around him, stroking his cock slowly at first. 

"Katniss," he groans between frenzied kisses as he rubs faster on my clit, and I try to mimic is his pace with my hand. His lips trail down my jaw to my neck, nibbling and sucking. 

My body starts to tremble, bucking and arching my back, and I bite my lip, knowing that I'm getting close, but I don't want to finish until I know Peeta is close. It's hard holding off when it feels so good. My breathing is full of raspy breaths from holding it, and my nails are digging into his shoulders and neck, holding onto him tightly while trying to keep the pace as best I can for him. 

"Let go," Peeta whispers in my ear, and his words send me over the edge. I come with a loud cry, panting and gasping for air, and he follows, groaning into my neck and sprinkling kisses on my skin. 

My hand is slick with his come when I move my hand away. I look at my coated fingers and curiously bring them to my lips, giving them a small lick. The taste of him is slightly odd, being a little salty and tangy, but I like it a lot and take another taste. I stare into Peeta's eyes, still dark and full of love, and I shiver. 

He moves my hand and gently pins it down next to my head as he kisses me deeply, his tongue running against mine and along the roof of my mouth before breaking the kiss as he bites my lower lip. "I love you." 

My other hand brushes the hair from his forehead. "And I love you." 

He kisses me again, slowly this time, then he moves off me and lies on his side, wraping an arm around my waist. His fingers feather up and down my spine, causing me to shiver. 

I nuzzle my head into his neck and close my eyes as we both try to steady our breathing.

— • — • — • — • — • — • — 

I feel Peeta's fingers ghosting over my back when I wake. I crack open an eye and see Peeta's blue eyes watching me with a smile on his face. I drown. "How long was I out?"

"Not very long." He kisses my forehead. "Just for a couple of minutes."

"Oh." My body shivers. 

Peeta pulls the blankets tighter around us. "I can start the fire again."

"No, don't," I say, wrapping my arm around his waist. He's so warm. I open my eyes fully, seeing the room is still dark and seeing little light coming through the window curtains. "What time is it?" 

"Still morning. Maybe a little later," he says. 

"I think it's snowing again." 

"As much as I hate to say it, we should probably get up."

"You're probably right."

Peeta and I start to get up and untangle ourselves from the blankets. My body shivers more. I wrap a blanket around me as I search for my clothes. Peeta finds his jeans and puts them on, then he starts to build up another fire. 

While he's distracted I find my bra and pants and quickly dress in them. I still can't find my long-sleeved shirt as I go through all the blankets again. I let out a frustrated sigh. 

"Here." Peeta, now fully dressed, hands me my shirt. "It was over by the couch," he says, his face turning a little pink. 

"Thanks," I say as I tug it on. My own face heats. Wanting to distract myself from my desires, I straighten out the blankets and take a seat on top of them. Peeta does the same. 

We're back where we started, sitting on the blankets and in front of the fire place. My body warms all over and it isn't just from the fire. Peeta's arm wraps around my waist, his hand resting on my hip. I lay my head on his shoulder and close my eyes, then I feel his head resting on mine. It's nice being like this with him, being warm and feeling loved.

Letting my desires get the better of me, I shift my head and kiss Peeta's neck. I feel his arm around me tighten and his head shift. His hand cups my cheek, then his lips meet mine, kissing me long and slow. He ends the kiss and rests his forehead against mine, looking deep into my eyes, making me blush and squirm. 

"I should go home," I say. "My mother might be wondering where I'm at." As the words come out of my mouth I suddenly feel dumb for using that excuse. It's sounds so lame, but I know it's likely true.

"No, yeah. You're probably right," Peeta says, giving me an assuring smile, then kisses my forehead. He lets me go, and we both get up. "I need to do some things and clean up." He grins at me, making me flush. 

"I'll see you later?" I ask, biting my lip, suddenly feeling shy. 

"Of course," he says, then he kisses me one last time before he lets me go. 

I walk toward the door and slip on my jacket. When I unlock and open the door, I see Haymitch standing in front of me, the smell of liquor in the air. I suddenly feel self-conscious and smooth my long-sleeved shirt of its wrinkles. Haymitch slants his body to the left, and I turn around seeing Peeta running a hand through his disheveled hair. 

"Having fun, sweetheart?" Haymitch says, teasing me. 

My face flushes in embarrassment. I didn't want him to find out so soon like this at all, not when I don't know where things are truly going with Peeta and I. I start to walk out the door, ignoring Haymitch, but he stops me. 

"I need to talk to both of you," he says. 

"Can it wait till later?" I ask, not wanting to talk about anything at all at the moment, especially if it's about us. 

"No it can't. It's important."

I stare at him, and I can tell he hasn't gotten much sleep and that he's been drinking. Something is bothering him, and I suddenly fear for the worst. 

"What's going on?" Peeta asks from behind me. 

I almost jump out of my skin. "Haymitch wants to talk to us," I tell him, turning around to face him. His blue eyes look slightly worried, and I try not to frown. 

"Come on in," Peeta tells Haymitch. I walk past Peeta as Haymitch enters the house, and the three of us make it to the living room. 

I panic at the sight on the floor. Peeta and I didn't bother straightening up the place after we got dressed. The blankets and pillows are still scattered around the floor, though some are straightens out. I can only imagine what Haymitch must be thinking now. 

Peeta clears his throat. "Would you like something to eat or drink?" 

"No, that's alright," Haymitch says as he takes a seat on a chair. "I'd prefer no distractions." He looks at the floor, then at us. 

"Must be serious then," Peeta says, and my heart sinks. We both take a seat on the couch across from Haymitch. 

"It is." He sighs. "The Victory Tour starts in less than a month, and it's not going to be easy."

"What do you mean?" I ask. They've broadcasted the tours on television countless times. The victor gives speeches and spends a week at the Capitol with new headlines every other hour it seemed streaming on the television. It couldn't be that hard, right? 

"You're still the star-crossed lovers of District Twelve. The Capitol hasn't forgotten it. You're going to be in the spotlight, and the media is going to be on you both every single day of every hour," he says. 

"Great," I grumble. 

"It sounds easy enough," Peeta says. 

"Everyone at the Capitol _will_ be watching you. There can't be any mess ups. You have to do everything right. That means whatever Effie or I tell you, you do it. Nothing else," Haymitch says, staring at us seriously. "It seems like you both have the romance thing down now, so it's one less thing to worry about, which will allow you to focus on the other things." 

I feel my face turn redder. 

"It should be fine," Haymitch tells us. "It's only a week long. You'll be back home before you know it." 

"Is there anything else?" I ask. All that he's said has made me worry. Most of his words I know are directed at me. 

"No. That's it. I just thought I'd warn both of you now what's to come instead of a day or two before when it happens." 

I noticed that Haymitch's tone has gone sadder. 

"It'll be fine," Peeta assures me, sensing my worry. He reaches for my hand. "Thanks for the warning."

"Just keep it up," Haymitch says as he gets up from the chair. "I will see you both later."

"I'll walk you out," Peeta says, releasing my hand and getting up, walking Haymitch to the door. 

I hear the door open, and it takes a few moments before it shuts. I know they exchanged a few words, but I decide not to dwell on it now as Haymitch's words replay in my mind. 

"Nearly a foot of snow is on the ground," Peeta says as he walks back into the room, rubbing his hands together to warm them up.

"Is it?" I ask distractedly. 

"Katniss, it'll be fine," he assures me, picking up on my thoughts, as he sits back down next to me. "We don't have anything to worry about."

I let out a small laugh. "Right." I frown. "I hope so." I wish I knew. Things don't feel right at all. "I think I'm going to go back to the house now," I say, meeting his gaze. 

"Okay," he says. "Try not to worry." Peeta kisses my temple. 

"I'll try not to," I tell him, and I know I will anyway. 

We both get up from the couch and make our way to the door once again. I suddenly have an urge to hug Peeta, and I do. "I love you," I tell him, hugging him tightly. 

"I love you too, Katniss," he says, holding me close and resting his chin on my head. He kisses my head and let's me go. "I'll be over for dinner tonight."

"Okay," I say, giving him a small smile and a kiss before I'm out the door. 

There's more than six inches of snow on the ground, and the wind is brisk and has picked up speed. As I walk home as fast as I can, I start to wonder more and more why Haymitch came by with this much snow on the ground. I know it couldn't have been easy for him.

When I reach the house, I notice it's quiet and warm. I hang up my leather jacket on the hook and take off my boots. As I make my way through the house toward the kitchen, I see a handwritten note on the table. 

_Gone out to check on some patients. We'll be back later this afternoon._

I smile. I'm happy Prim has been helping our mother with her rounds around town, knowing that she wants to help the sick and injured like she does. She's always had such a kind and gentle heart towards everyone. I only worry that the snow has delayed them and they likely won't be till later. 

I make my way upstairs to my room and freeze. There's a small box resting on my nightstand. I know it isn't from my mother or Prim. If it was from Peeta he likely would have given it to me while we spent the night together and not surprise me, knowing I don't like surprises at all. 

I'm not sure how long it's been here or how it got here. I look around my room and see nothing out of the ordinary besides the silver and white box. Slowly, I walk over to my nightstand. As I get closer, I instantly smell the stench of what belongs to President Snow. My heart starts to beat faster, and I feel nauseous with every step I take toward it. I take a deep breath and open the box, setting the ribbon lid on its side. Inside the box are hundreds of white rose petals with a single strip of white paper with black letters on it. 

_You've been warned, Miss Everdeen._


End file.
